Worst players in 92 clubs

[The Artful Shrimper]

Some blokes writing a tome about the biggest buffoons to bumble across the playing field sounds like a good book in the making and here's the info;-

I’m researching a book that will feature the worst players ever to appear for the 92 Football/Premier league clubs – perhaps not the worst in pure footballing terms – they could be nominated for a variety of reasons, preferably humorous ones! So far I have found tales of players who wouldn’t head the ball because of an ornate hairstyle, a goalkeeper who turned his back on an advancing forward giving him an easy finish and a player who stole from his team-mates (allegedly!)… you get the idea!

The fans are without doubt the best qualified people to decide on who is included in the book, and I’m hoping you can help me out – you can e-mail me with your nominations and suggestions at the_real_david_todd@yahoo.co.uk or I’ll be checking back here, as no doubt there will be some debate over this issue! If you e-mail me, please could you put the name of the club you are nominating the player from, as I’m getting correspondence from all 92 teams on this issue!

[Shrimp in a Kilt]

Quote[/b] (The Artful Shrimper @ April 27 2004,07:33)]Some blokes writing a tome about the biggest buffoons to bumble across the playing field sounds like a good book in the making and here's the info;-

<snip>
I trust his Insurance Policy is up to date, or is he not going to name names?

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[lordlumpington]

Can't remember his name but what about the guy who claimed to be George Weah's cousin. Southampton signed him
and then realised after 5 mins as a sub that the couldn't even kick the ball !

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[Clarky_Blues]

Quote[/b] (lordlumpington @ April 27 2004,10:57)]Can't remember his name but what about the guy who claimed to be George Weah's cousin. Southampton signed him
and then realised after 5 mins as a sub that the couldn't even kick the ball !

* http://www.shrimperzone.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif
Came on as sub an then duely got re-subbed himself - brilliant! What a debut.

[Javea Shrimper]

I nominate Chris Ramsey, Barry Silkman, Trevor Fitzpatrick, Mario Walsh, Eric Steele and Scott Forbes ...

WS

[Vange Shrimper]

Quote[/b] (Javea Shrimper @ April 27 2004,14:35)]Scott Forbes ...

WS
Bit harsh aint it?!! http://www.shrimperzone.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif

[HUMBLEPIE]

Quote[/b] (Javea Shrimper @ April 27 2004,14:35)]I nominate Chris Ramsey, Barry Silkman, Trevor Fitzpatrick, Mario Walsh, Eric Steele and Scott Forbes ...

WS
Talking of Barry Silkman I read in a Sunday paper he is taking the football league to court over a players signing on fee which has been with held for some reason, our Barry is down £100000.....beats racing whippets which he used to do.... http://www.shrimperzone.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[Javea Shrimper]

Quote[/b] (Vange Shrimper @ April 27 2004,14:50)]
Quote[/b] (Javea Shrimper @ April 27 2004,14:35)]Scott Forbes ...

WS
Bit harsh aint it?!! *http://www.shrimperzone.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif
Nope. Only one foot on him, he didn't know what the other one was for. Didn't rate the "jumpy man" at all ...

WS

[lordlumpington]

Quote[/b] (Javea Shrimper @ April 27 2004,14:35)]I nominate Chris Ramsey, Barry Silkman, Trevor Fitzpatrick, Mario Walsh, Eric Steele and Scott Forbes ...

WS
Can't agree with Scott Forbes he was a just bit off a sick note.

I'll second Chris Ramsey though !

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[elmo putney]

we could feature heavily in this book! pick practically any of our centre forwards over the last 7 years i reckon...... neil campbell excluded!!!

[Matt the Shrimp]

Mike - how on earth can your "worst ever" list not include the mercurial talents of one Mr. Gordon Connelly...?!

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Connelly was, unquestionably, the worst player I've ever seen in a Southend shirt.

Matt

[Matt the Shrimp]

Quote[/b] (elmo putney @ April 27 2004,15:54)]we could feature heavily in this book! pick practically any of our centre forwards over the last 7 years i reckon...... neil campbell excluded!!!
Huh?! Surely Neil Campbell is right at the top of the Sh!t Parade?!

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Matt

[lordlumpington]

Quote[/b] (The Artful Shrimper @ April 27 2004,07:33)]they could be nominated for a variety of reasons, preferably humorous ones! So far I have found tales of players who wouldn’t head the ball because of an ornate hairstyle, a goalkeeper who turned his back on an advancing forward giving him an easy finish and a player who stole from his team-mates (allegedly!)… you get the idea!
Drew purely for his white boots in Cardiff http://www.shrimperzone.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif

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[Barry the dog]

Gordon Connelly, Keith Dublin, Drew Broughton, Sada Indye, and last but not least Barry Conlon.

[Shrimp in a Kilt]

Quote[/b] (Clarky_Blues @ April 27 2004,14:34)]
Quote[/b] (lordlumpington @ April 27 2004,10:57)]Can't remember his name but what about the guy who claimed to be George Weah's cousin. Southampton signed him
and then realised after 5 mins as a sub that the couldn't even kick the ball !

* http://www.shrimperzone.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif
Came on as sub an then duely got re-subbed himself - brilliant! *What a debut.
It was a friendly, and he was a trialist... I think we have seen a few trialists who would have been better off being subbed before they even came on.

[Surrey Blue]

Quote[/b] (lordlumpington @ April 27 2004,14:59)]
Quote[/b] (Javea Shrimper @ April 27 2004,14:35)]I nominate Chris Ramsey, Barry Silkman, Trevor Fitzpatrick, Mario Walsh, Eric Steele and Scott Forbes ...

WS
Can't agree with Scott Forbes he was a just bit off a sick note.

I'll second Chris Ramsey though !

* * http://www.shrimperzone.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
and i will third it

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[stid]

In order of awfulness:-

1) Richard Young
2) Sada N'Diaye
3) Chris Ramsey
4) Dominic Iorfa
5) Any of dozens

Barry Conlon? I'd put him in the TOP half of all the Southend players I've ever seen. He was given a hard time by an "element" and has since shown that he's got plenty of ability. Probably better than 90% of the forwards we've had since he left.

[Javea Shrimper]

Quote[/b] (stid @ April 27 2004,18:45)]Barry Conlon? I'd put him in the TOP half of all the Southend players I've ever seen. He was given a hard time by an "element" and has since shown that he's got plenty of ability. Probably better than 90% of the forwards we've had since he left.
Indeed. Not a great fan of his but he was a lot better than many remember. As always, however, a couple of stinkers and the "I know better and can do better which is why I'm in this stand and you are on the pitch" crowd start to abuse a player and his game goes to pot. I'd certainly rather have Barry Conlon than that waste of space Tes Bramble or indeed the likes of the pathetic Barrington Belgrave, Tony Richards, etc ...

WS

[Bigdel]

Quote[/b] (Matt the Shrimp @ April 27 2004,15:56)]Mike - how on earth can your "worst ever" list not include the mercurial talents of one Mr. Gordon Connelly...?!

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Connelly was, unquestionably, the worst player I've ever seen in a Southend shirt.

Matt
Except that mid week game against Brighton 1.0 down at half time,and GC tore them about in the second half to win two one.
After that complete pants http://www.shrimperzone.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[Wickford Blue]

What about Graeme Jones...the target man in Lead Boots!!

[Javea Shrimper]

Yep.

Jeez! We've had more than our fair share of horrifically bad so-called strikers :

- Yemi Abiodun
- Barrington Belgrave
- Neil Campbell
- Trevor Fitzpatrick
- Dominic Foley
- Dominic Iorfa
- Graeme Jones
- Sada N'Diaye
- Tony Richards
- Neville Roach
- Daniel Webb
- David Whyte

I can only think of the likes of Andy Thomson, Martin Carruthers and current man Leon Constantine as being strikers who really had some talent ...

WS

[Ron Manager]

Have to agree with the nomination for Richard Young. I was a mere pup when we signed him and watching him play was the first time I realised that not everyone in a Blue shirt was a footballing genius to be hero-worshipped and copied in school playground matches (as I had rather sweetly believed up to that point) but that in fact some of them could be completely useless donkeys.

For shattering that innocence and turning me into a typically cynical SUFC supporter Richard Young gets my vote.

[Mick]

Quote[/b] (Clarky_Blues @ April 27 2004,14:34)]
Quote[/b] (lordlumpington @ April 27 2004,10:57)]Can't remember his name but what about the guy who claimed to be George Weah's cousin. Southampton signed him
and then realised after 5 mins as a sub that the couldn't even kick the ball !

* http://www.shrimperzone.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif
Came on as sub an then duely got re-subbed himself - brilliant! *What a debut.
Ali Dia(h).

He was studying law (with special interest in the "fraud" and "deception" sections) whilst trying to break into Gateshead's third team !

[Mick]

Quote[/b] (Javea Shrimper @ April 27 2004,20:46)]Yep.

Jeez! We've had more than our fair share of horrifically bad so-called strikers :

- Yemi Abiodun
- Barrington Belgrave
- Neil Campbell
- Trevor Fitzpatrick
- Dominic Foley *
- Dominic Iorfa
- Graeme Jones
- Sada N'Diaye
- Tony Richards
- Neville Roach
- Daniel Webb
- David Whyte

I can only think of the likes of Andy Thomson, Martin Carruthers and current man Leon Constantine as being strikers who really had some talent ...

WS
ah yes, Carruthers the man we could have got £200,000 for but Webb/Martin were greedy and finished up paying him £45,000 and getting £20,000 from Sc**thorpe. Someone remind me again what a good job Webby did reducing our wage bill!!

[Smithy]

Neville Southall

[LITTLEMAN]

Or Dean Holness from Dream Team

[footymad13]

How can anyone forget Rio Alderton ?

[ASHRIMPER]

Neil Campbell and Neville Roach were Awfull.

foley was well disapointing when on loan considering he was a past ireland international

So were Gordon Connerley and dominic IORFA.