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  1. Slipperduke

    Pre-Match Thread Southend Seek To Add To Scolari's Woes

    Don't panic on the first line, you haven't got the day wrong. This is for tomorrow's paper! Six months ago, who could have believed that Chelsea would see tonight’s trip to Southend as anything other than a formality? For just a brief period at the start of his reign, Luiz Felipe Scolari...
  2. londonblue

    Very Funny

    On the way out of the ground on Saturday my wife texted her brother the score. He's a Chelsea fan, but wasn't at the game because he was on holiday. At the end of the text she asked if he wanted us to get him a ticket for the replay. His reply was just two words, "Very funny"! He wasn't amused!
  3. Norad tracks Santa

    Something to keep the kids amused.....see where Santa is now. http://www.noradsanta.org/en/home.html
  4. Random Shrimper Googles

    Whilst waiting for someone to come here and say how many tickets sold for Chelsea, I though I would keep myself amused by googling 'shrimper' and seeing what non-SUFC related stuff it throws up. The first is a book on amazon that at first glance looked like it was called Unreasonable Woman...
  5. Slipperduke

    Dire Chelsea Give Scolari Headache

    They say that fortune favours the brave, but apparently the deal isn't exclusive. On a miserable night in Southern France, the fates took a shine to a substandard, disappointing Chelsea side who should have seen their Champions League hopes laid to waste, but somehow survived to snatch a vital...
  6. Slipperduke

    Question Interactive Novel Writing

    Ok, bit of a weird one this. I have here the first 1,500 words of a story, battered out in an afternoon to no distinct end or conclusion. It's a first draft, it hasn't been polished or checked and, critically, it doesn't have a direction. I was thinking of a British version of Lost/Journey To...
  7. duncan bulgaria

    My old man is a hoodie and a criminal

    Could help but laugh when i spoke to my old man yesterday as he was telling me that now he has his free bus pass he has been reaping the rewards of being retired by taking my muv into classy establishments like the five bells and the moon and square ?? in Basildon ( lucky lady ). Anyway he...
  8. Slipperduke

    Shambles at St James

    Kevin Keegan has gone, Mike Ashley is going and the Toon Army can no longer be relied upon to fund the senseless destruction of their football team. Newcastle United are in meltdown, slumped near the bottom of the Premier League and now, thanks to this lacklustre defeat at the hands of...
  9. Crabby Shrimper

    Couple of local Youtube vids

    Just got sent these via Facebook, and have to say they do bring back some memories for an exile! Everyone's gone to the moon (on the square) Hit me with your bazzo stick Well, they amused me anyway
  10. sufc_tom

    Tranmere Stewards/Fans

    Absolutly fantastic they were:) They kept themselves amused by constanly moving my flag around and throwing balloons at me. And the fans were great afterwards, one bloke came up and said "good luck in the play offs and please please pleeeease beat Leeds and Forest for us" also "If you all...
  11. Slipperduke

    Manchester United v Barcelona part 2

    When he looks back on this game, Cristiano Ronaldo’s only consolation will be that at least John Arne Riise’s mistake was worse. Not many gifts get handed out at the Camp Nou, but Gabriel Milito’s decision to wave his hands in front of a second minute corner like a man trying to shake off the...
  12. Slipperduke

    2008 European Championships

    While England’s footballers sulk in their sun-loungers, the rest of the continent will be contesting the 2008 European Championships. Iain Macintosh, who still won’t allow the word ‘McClaren’ to be uttered in his home, runs the rule over some of the potential stars of the summer. This week, it’s...
  13. leeblue

    Dont be so gloomy peeps

    A defeat at millwall was indeed poop, but we are only four, yes four points off the play offs, I have been amused by some comments stating that we cant reach the play offs and our season is over etc etc, one look at the league table suggests otherwise, yes our performances have certainly been up...
  14. the truth about millwall

    Sadly I was lounging round the pool in Florida, when the game took place(someone has to) but for various reasons, I spend a lot of my working week in south london, literally 3 minutes from the new den, so it amused me no end to see all the posts on here, of people worried about wearing shirts...
  15. Matt the Shrimp

    The fbm report - Millwall

    Folks, As I'm not quite sure what time I'll get back tonight in order to post this on the front page, it is not fair to deny fbm his readership - or to deny you his pearls of wisdom - so here is the fbm report for the Millwall game, which will hopefully go up on the front page tonight. * * * *...
  16. On a lighter note....

    ....Did anyone else see the incident in front of the West Stand just after Harrold got sent off and Owusuo had gone down? FYI: Their no: 14 and No; 6 were on the touchline with the 14 just about to tae a throw, and loads of W***ker! chants being directed in the general direction of the pair...
  17. Southminster_Shrimper

    The Most Bizarre Thread - Index (First 78 Pages)

    An index or a guide..... - Jay Shrimpers New Sex Mad Chick (assistance provided by Playgirl_Bunny) - Essex Girls Being After Just Money (vigorously refuted by Vange_Shrimper) - Romantic Gestures (including flowers, meals out, etc) - The Love Life Of Young Mr Hutton (From Page 5 – surprisingly...
  18. shrimp and two veg

    Shall i,shan't i,YOU be judge and jury....

    Ok,here's my conondrum. The wife is flitting off to Spain next weekend for a beano with the girls and having obviously checked the fixtures i am now aware we are at home to Rochdale in the cup. Now,as it stands,i have to look after my 3yr old twins,boy and girl BTW. The question i'd like to...
  19. Do you support Premiership clubs in europe?

    The thread about Premiership games being played in the US and whether this would be 'selling the soul' of English football prompted this poll. At one time I always supported English clubs when they played in European competitions but increasingly am no longer bothered and was quite amused to...
  20. Player to watch, according to Brighton.

    Was amused to read the last part (Player to Watch) of this article on Vital Brighton. We should score a hat full of goals if all their players are looking for Billy :hilarious: :hilarious: :hilarious: :hilarious: http://www.bha.vitalfootball.co.uk/article.asp?a=500408