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disease

  1. Lord Football

    The Jade Goody Society

    Firstly, and most importantly, I'll state that cancer is a terrible and indescriminate disease. It strikes the young and it strikes the old. I would not wish cancer on my worst enemy. But I am getting increasingly concerned at the media circus that is Jade Goody. Let us look a back at some...
  2. Boreham Shrimper

    Bill Frindall has died

    Test Match Special statistician and scorer Bill Frindall has died at the age of 69 after suffering from Legionnaire's disease. This is very sad news and I'll miss hearing him giving out some of the most bizarre statistics and facts about the game. R.I.P.
  3. seany t

    Media overreaction - stories that were... well... rubbish

    I've been running my ever cynical eye over the goings on in our national media of late, and got into a heated debate with a few work folk the other evening regarding some of the big issues in the spotlight right now. A few seemed to have an immense amount of hatred for city bankers, Social...
  4. Aberdeen Shrimper

    Crestor.....new wonder pill for Heart disease

    Yeahhhhhhh, I now feel safe having a massive fry up at lunchtime now :) http://afp.google.com/article/ALeqM5jOGplzboTpFg0hit4DCZZXpflTyQ
  5. Hotman

    Easy guide to World Politics and Economics

    SOCIALISM You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbour. COMMUNISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk. FASCISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk. NAZISM You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you. BUREAUCRATISM You have...
  6. toellandback

    Geoff Horsfield

    Horsfield reveals cancer battle The 34-year-old has been forced to retire as a result and will undergo surgery next week. He told the Daily Mirror: "I was diagnosed last Friday and I'm going in for surgery next Thursday. "The surgeon has told me that this is the end of my professional...
  7. shrimper loz

    Tourette's

    I'm going to be taking part in a charity bike ride to raise funds for Mute Tourette's Syndrome. A friend of mine has a 6 yr old son that suffers from this and we are raising funds to pay for a year's therapy. Mute Tourette's Syndrome has long been in the shadow of its more 'famous'...
  8. davewebbsbrain

    The 'Ed Zachary' disease

    Ed Zachary Disease A woman was very distraught at the fact that she had not had a date or any sex in quite some time. She was afraid she might have something wrong with her, so she decided to seek the medical expertise of a sex therapist. Her doctor recommended that she see the well known...
  9. CC51DAS

    Inbreds feature in BBC documentary

    INBREDS PLAGUED BY DISEASE Colchester United fans are suffering from genetic diseases following years of inbreeding, an investigation has found. A BBC documentary says they are suffering acute problems because incest is emphasised over health when breeding. The programme shows Colchester...
  10. Matt the Shrimp

    Matt the Shrimp in "running" shock...

    Folks, As anyone who has had the (dubious) pleasure of meeting me will be able to testify, mine is a body that was built for comfort rather than speed. However, I'm about to put that presumption to the test on Thursday week by undertaking a 5km run for charity - in this case, for Breakthrough...
  11. Why Al Gore is bad for the planet

    Did you know that the Live Earth concert to "save the planet" released more Co2 into the atmosphere than every 4x4 in America? Or that estrogen from birth control and "morning after" pills is causing male fish across the world to develop female sex organs - and that environmentalists, who are...
  12. ldnfatso

    Medical Alert

    The Center for Disease Control has issued a medical alert about a highly contagious, potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally, by hand, and even electronically. This virus is called Weary Overload Recreational Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from your boss, any of your...
  13. Slipperduke

    A Christmas Tale

    They don't do it in Germany, they've long since given it up in Spain and the French would be astonished if you suggested that they should give it a try. The Christmas football fixture list is a curiously British and Irish disease. With almost every other civilised nation doing the sensible...
  14. The Watermill Wino

    Sad news for Sammy the Shrimp

    It's with great sadness and with a slight tear in my eye that I have to inform you that Robin Duncan the guy who started off Sammy the Shrimp has passed away. His years and years of involvement at Southend United with Sammy and hundreds of charity events and openings means we have lost a brave...
  15. Usual_Suspect

    Dr Chang

    After no dates or sex for 5 years a woman goes to see a Chinese sex therapist, Dr. Chang. Chang: ‘Rake off all ror crose, gret down on floor and craw reery reery fas to odderside of room’. So she does…… Chang: ‘ok craw reery reery fas bac’ As she is doing so, Chang stands there...
  16. Ponder These

    Can you cry under water? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches? Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round? Why do you have to "put your two cents...
  17. Winkle

    When dog farts smell bad!!!

    Monty, a loveable three year old pedigree labrador who unfortunatly after his last visit to the vets was advised in no uncertain terms that he was suffering from a curable labrador disease... obesity! Not massive but enough to start the poor fella down the road of the worst words none to dogkind...
  18. MrB

    Chuck Norris

    Chuck Norris used live ammunition during all shoot-outs. When the director said he can't, he replied, "Of course I can, I'm Chuck Norris" and roundhouse kicked him in the face. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death...
  19. Napster

    The 1980-1 championship team

    John Walker A defender, Walker made 51 league appearances in 6Å years at Southend. In 1983 he joined the police; at 47, he is a chief inspector in Rayleigh, Essex. 2 David Cusack Signed from Sheffield Wednesday in 1978, Cusack played more than 200 times in defence for the Shrimpers and was...
  20. Smiffy

    Hooligans

    Shocking!... Seem's like a worldwide disease. Bet The Goat wont be too happy when he reads of this. Sounds like its a regular occurance... And we thought it was bad over here. Here
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