A Moral Dilemma - Update

[Andy_Shrimp]

Firstly, thanks to all those who posted a reply on my original post.

As I said plans were changed and as such Amanda came round for dinner on Friday. We had some nice food and some wine and as before got on really well.

I am very cautious about relationships as been there before and don't want to get involved too quickly. Anyway, Amanda and I enjoyed Friday and I should say that she left earlier today (just before kick off) so I got to enjoy (if that is the word) the game on the SZ chat zone.

Anyway, we did have a good time and got on really well, perhaps too well!!! Anyway, now I have another issue (sorry) but she wanted to come back tonight but I said no as i have some work to do. Not strictly true but just think its too much too soon. Don't want to sound like a kid here as i am 35 have two lovely children and a failed marriage behind me, I am just not ready for a full on relationship right now, but then again I don't want to miss out on something that could be right.

I would say why can't life be simple, but I know all too well that it can't, but I think that I should slow this down before it gets out of hand, but again I don't want to hurt her feelings

Advice welcome

Andy

 

[Cricko2]

Firstly, thanks to all those who posted a reply on my original post.

As I said plans were changed and as such Amanda came round for dinner on Friday. We had some nice food and some wine and as before got on really well.

I am very cautious about relationships as been there before and don't want to get involved too quickly. Anyway, Amanda and I enjoyed Friday and I should say that she left earlier today (just before kick off) so I got to enjoy (if that is the word) the game on the SZ chat zone.

Anyway, we did have a good time and got on really well, perhaps too well!!! Anyway, now I have another issue (sorry) but she wanted to come back tonight but I said no as i have some work to do. Not strictly true but just think its too much too soon. Don't want to sound like a kid here as i am 35 have two lovely children and a failed marriage behind me, I am just not ready for a full on relationship right now, but then again I don't want to miss out on something that could be right.

I would say why can't life be simple, but I know all too well that it can't, but I think that I should slow this down before it gets out of hand, but again I don't want to hurt her feelings

Advice welcome

Andy

We have all made mistakes I am sure Andy...I Maybe agree with you that it needs a little slowing down but go with how your heart is rather than the past effecting it..You have Nothing to lose maybe alot to gain ..It is how you feel about it that matters ..obviously without hurting your friend.


Friday till Sunday Hmmmmm

 

[jstallan]

Life is too short and happiness can be tough to find, so if it feels right just do it....:)

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

Andy, my advice is to just be honest with her about how you're feeling.
Say you are really enjoying her company but with all that's happened to you in the past you want to make sure things progress at a rate you feel comfortable with. If she sees a future for you she'll be happy to know what you're thinking and should be accommodating, if she's not then seeing as it's early days, you've not really lost out.

Hope that helps! Sounds like you had a good couple of days anyway!

 

[JoshC]

have you spoken to her about her leg? or do you feel too akward?

 

[Cricko2]

Pmsl Josh .........That did make me laugh.:p

I'm sure you were serious too.

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

have you spoken to her about her leg? or do you feel too akward?

See the other original thread for the answer to that one!

 

[Desert Shrimper]

I think our relationships expert DtS should step in here with some advice.....

:rolleyes:

 

[Ricey]

have you spoken to her about her leg? or do you feel too akward?

Have I missed something?

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

Have I missed something?

Patently you have!
I refer myself to my earlier statement!
Go look at the other thread!

 

[Matt the Shrimp]

Yep, our Glaswegian chum is on the money here. Just tell her your thoughts - she sounds like she's more than sensible enough to be able to handle them.

:)

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

Yep, our Glaswegian chum is on the money here. Just tell her your thoughts - she sounds like she's more than sensible enough to be able to handle them.

:)

Well if you need me to start a Dear Richie column over the summer to fill the void............ ? ? ? :hilarious:

 

[Cheltenham Shrimper]

Well if you need me to start a Dear Richie column over the summer to fill the void............ ? ? ? :hilarious:

That would be worth reading.... ;)

 

[Jonny_Stokes]

I used to have a Dear Jonny thread :(

 

[Jam_Man]

Just remember, make sure you make a mental note of where her DVD player is in case it doesnt work out and you need to sneak out early...

 

[Davros]

tell her how you feel man...

if she listens and is cool with it, its all good... if she goes all funny, and is negative and stuff about it, shes not the one... at least u'll know sooner rather than later

 

[DTS]

I used to have a Dear Jonny thread :(

I used to like this feature. :hilarious:

 

[DTS]

Dont see why you have to rush anything personally...You have had a few nice dates and both get on well. Why cant you just keep seeing her and see how it goes. There does not need to be a massive rush does there?

If as time goes on the leg thing is an issue you can be honest with her and call it quits from there. As you spend more time together you might find it really is no issue and that is it.

DtS

 

[Andy_Shrimp]

Ok, again thanks for the replies, much appreciated.

Amanda and I are no more. We met up last week a few times and she came round last night after I dropped the children off. I told her that I am not ready for a full on relationship and thought that we were heading that way. I asked if we could slow things down and "date" to see how things go.

She told me that she wants more now and that she thought I was the one as we do get on. I said that yes we do BUT it is getting too much too soon. I do like her but I think she was ready to move in. I may have made a big mistake but I don't want a full on relationship right now. I am not saying that I want to play around as I don't. But i don't want an every day relationship I want time on my own with the kids and just time alone - she indicated that she wanted to see me every day.

I will see her again as we drink in the same pub and who knows what will happen, I do hope we can still see each other but will keep it strictly to the pub for the time being.

And before anyone asks, no the leg was not an issue, infact it was better!!!!

Andy

 

[Pubey]

And before anyone asks, no the leg was not an issue, infact it was better!!!!

:eek: i think details are required

fair play mate you know what you want and I'm sure it was a hard decision to make