• Welcome to the ShrimperZone forums.
    You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which only gives you limited access.

    Existing Users:.
    Please log-in using your existing username and password. If you have any problems, please see below.

    New Users:
    Join our free community now and gain access to post topics, communicate privately with other members, respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and free. Click here to join.

    Fans from other clubs
    We welcome and appreciate supporters from other clubs who wish to engage in sensible discussion. Please feel free to join as above but understand that this is a moderated site and those who cannot play nicely will be quickly removed.

    Assistance Required
    For help with the registration process or accessing your account, please send a note using the Contact us link in the footer, please include your account name. We can then provide you with a new password and verification to get you on the site.

Dale farm evictions "may breach human rights"

I challenge you to come up with a solution to the issue of Dale farm that falls within the law and is good value for the taxpayer. Imagine that you are a policy officer at Basildon council. remember that even in your dystopian vision of society, breaking planning permission is not a capital offence. Also remember that as much as you hate them these people are British and so deportation is not an option either. I eagerly await your offering.

I fancy a go at this...

Firstly, I'm going to call a meeting, this meeting will involve my other policy officers from other council offices coming over, better get some cabs booked. Next up, can't use a meeting room at the council offices, better book another meeting to discuss the best place to have this meeting, get on the blower and book some cabs to ferry around everyone to the meeting planning meeting. Christ on a bike! I forgot, which cab company shall we use? I'd better book a meeting to discuss the travel arrangements to get to the meeting to plan the meeting of the meeting.

I should be in the Public Sector, I think I've just ******* £5k up the wall by doing the sum total of **** all.
 
I've got a challenge for you Rusty. Imagine for a minute that you are not a comic strip character from Viz.

I'm not sure which Viz character you imagine me to be, because I'm sure that you couldn't have any knowledge of my infeasibly large gonads. As for you, you're clearly Malcolm from 'The Modern Parents'.
 
I'm not sure which Viz character you imagine me to be, because I'm sure that you couldn't have any knowledge of my infeasibly large gonads. As for you, you're clearly Malcolm from 'The Modern Parents'.

Rusty: I dont believe I've had the pleasure.
Applelover: Oh, on ze contrary! We have met many times, alzhough
you knew me by anozher name. Do you recall a mysterious black
marketeer and smuggler called Otto, with whom you used to dine and
plot and play ze biscuit game, at ze Old Pizzle in Dover?
Rusty: My God!
Applelover: Yes! I was.......... the waitress.
Rusty: I dont believe it! You? Big Sally?
Applelover: [in high-pitched voice] Will you have another piece of
pie, my lord?
Rusty: But I went to bed with you, didnt I?
Applelover: For my country, I am willing to make any sacrifice.
Rusty: Yes, but Im not! I must have been paralytic!
Applelover: Indeed you were... Mister Floppy!
 
Rusty: I dont believe I've had the pleasure.
Applelover: Oh, on ze contrary! We have met many times, alzhough
you knew me by anozher name. Do you recall a mysterious black
marketeer and smuggler called Otto, with whom you used to dine and
plot and play ze biscuit game, at ze Old Pizzle in Dover?
Rusty: My God!
Applelover: Yes! I was.......... the waitress.
Rusty: I dont believe it! You? Big Sally?
Applelover: [in high-pitched voice] Will you have another piece of
pie, my lord?
Rusty: But I went to bed with you, didnt I?
Applelover: For my country, I am willing to make any sacrifice.
Rusty: Yes, but Im not! I must have been paralytic!
Applelover: Indeed you were... Mister Floppy!

I remember it like it was yesterday.
 
I heard from a reliable source (actually reliable, not football style rumor) that during the roadworks at Sadlers Farm, the contruction workers found that the ... gypsies/travellers/insert politically correct name here.. had illiegally piped direct into the electicity main. Upon finding this, the connection was disconnected. 3 days later, a letter was recieved from the Gypsy Council threatning to sue them for disconnecting their electricty.

Also from the same source, there have been many cases of the gypsies (adult and children) trying to ride away on the plant machinery of an evening.
 
Have you got any arguments to make or are you just going to stick with moral outrage and your misplaced sense of superiority?

You heard it here first. Rusty the right wing reactionary accuses someone else of moral outrage and having a misplaced sense of superiority. Priceless:hilarious:
 
I fancy a go at this...

Firstly, I'm going to call a meeting, this meeting will involve my other policy officers from other council offices coming over, better get some cabs booked. Next up, can't use a meeting room at the council offices, better book another meeting to discuss the best place to have this meeting, get on the blower and book some cabs to ferry around everyone to the meeting planning meeting. Christ on a bike! I forgot, which cab company shall we use? I'd better book a meeting to discuss the travel arrangements to get to the meeting to plan the meeting of the meeting.

I should be in the Public Sector, I think I've just ******* £5k up the wall by doing the sum total of **** all.

I asked Rusty to imagine he was a policy officer, I didn't ask him to take on the personality traits and working practices of an actual policy officer.:smile:
 
You heard it here first. Rusty the right wing reactionary accuses someone else of moral outrage and having a misplaced sense of superiority. Priceless:hilarious:

Haven't you just proven my point? Your only critique of what I say is that it is either 'right-wing' or 'stupid'. I'm surprised you don't just end each post by calling me a fascist bully boy.
 
Haven't you just proven my point? Your only critique of what I say is that it is either 'right-wing' or 'stupid'. I'm surprised you don't just end each post by calling me a fascist bully boy.

It gets better :hilarious:. Please keep them coming. Every post you send contains the words 'liberal, lefty, bleeding heart'
 
I asked Rusty to imagine he was a policy officer, I didn't ask him to take on the personality traits and working practices of an actual policy officer.:smile:

OK, imagine you're Tes Bramble. Your slightly more able footballing brother has brought a girl back to the hotel, she's sleeping. What do you do?
 
Back
Top