Dog rape and the after effects!

[Winkle]

Many of you have in the last few months red posts on here about my 3 year labrador called Monty and his amazing ability to eat anything, even cow patts. I have managed however, to turn a blind eye to this (as gut wrenching as it is) but unfortunatly we have know entered a new realm of unspeakable behavior, dog rape! I must add at this point that Monty is the victim in all this and whilst I considerd the odd licking of balls (whats left of them a treat) other dogs of various sizes and breeds have know cottoned on that Monty is there for the taking and Penetrive sex took part at 09:47 this morning over the park.
Some of you may wonder how a mongrel of no stature was able to mount a 40kg pedigree black labrador, but the dirty deed took place and before I could yank the assaulting offender off, Im sure Monty , how would you say it...... got bashed up the dirt tunnel! The sad thing in all this is that (for a split second) I got the uneasy feeling he was actually enjoying it and has become *excuse the pun* somebodys bitch!
Is there some kind of law against this behavior? Has a crime taken place? Do you think I need to find a dog counsellor for one to one help. This got me thinking, there are not many pleasures left for the poor chap as he as been on a diet recently ,but should I consede that he is just more in touch with his femenine side? I probably have the larry Grayson and John Inman of all dogs but the thing is( before this) I was a great beleiver in dogs reflecting there owners, but sadly in this case it isnt true. Should I just turn a blind eye to the odd bash up the dirt box or get him to do some kind of training (abit like Rocky) so he can fight back, urgent advice needed!

 

[Pubey]

hahahahahahahahahahaha

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

Post of the week!

 

[Pubey]

i just laughed so much a bit of wee came out and everyone in my office thinks im crazy!

 

[ldnfatso]

Many of you have in the last few months red posts on here about my 3 year labrador called Monty and his amazing ability to eat anything, even cow patts. I have managed however, to turn a blind eye to this (as gut wrenching as it is) but unfortunatly we have know entered a new realm of unspeakable behavior, dog rape! I must add at this point that Monty is the victim in all this and whilst I considerd the odd licking of balls (whats left of them a treat) other dogs of various sizes and breeds have know cottoned on that Monty is there for the taking and Penetrive sex took part at 09:47 this morning over the park.
Some of you may wonder how a mongrel of no stature was able to mount a 40kg pedigree black labrador, but the dirty deed took place and before I could yank the assaulting offender off, Im sure Monty , how would you say it...... got bashed up the dirt tunnel! The sad thing in all this is that (for a split second) I got the uneasy feeling he was actually enjoying it and has become *excuse the pun* somebodys bitch!
Is there some kind of law against this behavior? Has a crime taken place? Do you think I need to find a dog counsellor for one to one help. This got me thinking, there are not many pleasures left for the poor chap as he as been on a diet recently ,but should I consede that he is just more in touch with his femenine side? I probably have the larry Grayson and John Inman of all dogs but the thing is( before this) I was a great beleiver in dogs reflecting there owners, but sadly in this case it isnt true. Should I just turn a blind eye to the odd bash up the dirt box or get him to do some kind of training (abit like Rocky) so he can fight back, urgent advice needed!

Have you been teaching your dog new tricks?:hilarious: :hilarious:

 

[Slipperduke]

Am I the only one with an image in my head of Monty in the shower, crying his eyes out? He's scrubbing and scrubbing, but he'll never feel clean again.

 

[Pubey]

Am I the only one with an image in my head of Monty in the shower, crying his eyes out? He's scrubbing and scrubbing, but he'll never feel clean again.

refusing to go to the police but then mentioning it 10years later everytime he drinks a couple of g&t's

 

[MK Shrimper]

You've got a gay dog there mate. Dress him up in pink, introduce him to Judy Garland, he'll be a happy pooch.

 

[Winkle]

UPDATE
On informing (the missus) about this attack today, her exact words left me aghast, they where "well, I have been wanting to tell you as it has happened before but was trying to find the right moment" ..... really, my dog is gay and takes it up the gary glitter and I had to find it out for myself... how selfish.
These issues may seem trivial to my wife and her, being a trainee counsellor, has suggested that as Monty as felt the need to come out of the closet, and delt with his issues so should I.
So be warned anyone who walks ther dogs around the chelmsford area, if you see a very large black labrador with a pink hankercheif hanging from his collar, its got nothing what so ever to do with me!

 

[McNasty]

Having been a dog breeder for many years I can tell you that he is submissive and dominated by the other animals to the point of being a "taker". Many people say the dogs are like their owners , so beware if you go out with a short skirt on !

 

[DTS]

Wish I saved some rep for this post rather than marking Josh C, Matty the Shrimper and the General down for pointless reasons. Classic. ;)

 

[Desert Shrimper]

****ing brilliant!!

You have a gay dog, whereas I have a female dog that is a complete slag and obsessed with ****. If we're out walking she'll always make a beeline for it which is always a bit embarrassing if you're trying to make small talk with the other owner just as your dog is attempting to nosh their dog off. It's particularly uncomfortable if we're talking young attractive female dog owner here. :minger:

Last week I was walking her in the park when I came across the dog equivalent of a Mexican stand-off. A greyhound and a sheepdog were having a good crack at eachother, snarling away while seemingly there owners were miles away as nobody stepped in. Probably because they were both very quick, strong dogs and it was a busy day at the park, a bit of a crowd gathered to watch them and to pull their kids in so they were out of harms way. I stopped to watch too as it looked pretty nasty and there was a lot of baring of teeth and attempted neck bites going on. After 30 seconds or so the dogs stopped for a minute to face eachother off. It was at this tense moment that my dog chose to trundle over to them - but she hadn't gone over to get involved - she just wanted to lick the greyhound's **** and balls. :confused:

I've since wondered what must have been going through the greyhound's mind at the time as a little Westie licked away on his old chap while he was busy trying to preserve his alpha-dog status. :eek:

 

[SARF]

Dog psychology.. brilliant.. there are roughly 4 stages of Dog social standing..
1. Effing vicious c..ts that will kill anything
2. The average park alpha dog.. Takes no **** and generally very cool (unless the stand off ball lick situation described above occurs)
3. All the other normal dogs that just bum around.. er sorry.. mess about trying find out where they stand in Dogworld
4. Those annoying wimp dogs that either leg it for miles forcing your own dog to chase them while their owners squeal, or those dogs that their owners pick up and wonder why all proper dogs jump all over em trying the chase the wimpy f..ker,,
and of course a new stage 5 hound.. Winkles Dog

 

[Cricko2]

Slipper has never had a problem with dogs:D

 

[Slipperduke]

Slipper has never had a problem with dogs:D

I used to have a problem getting them out of the house before my flatmates wake-up. They were such cruel judges.

 

[Flinty]

:hilarious: :hilarious: :hilarious:

this post was briefly mentioned last night and deserves to be placed back on page 1 for anyone who like me missed it, i am literally crying here the rest of the office are looking and wondering what is going on

fan bloody tastic.....


nb isn't there some rep points at stake over the date of this thread?????

 

[Matt the Shrimp]

I'd completely forgotten about Winkle's gay dog - I wish we'd talked about it last night!

:hilarious:

 

[The Big C]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Gay_Al's_Big_Gay_Boat_Ride

 

[grayhound]

Excellent thread!

 

[MrB]

nb isn't there some rep points at stake over the date of this thread?????

I don't recall a specific stake being agreed...... :o