Slipperduke
The Camden Cad
If you think it's tense at the top of the Premier League, you should see The Championship at this stage of the season. With a collection of runners and riders who all seem incapable of stringing consecutive wins together, it's the division that no-one wants to win. Wolverhampton Wanderers have led the way for much of the season, but a visit to second-placed local rivals Birmingham City was an unwanted stop on their itinerary. Derby matches at this level are ferocious affairs and Wolves have had enough problems already
Their creative right-winger, Michael Kightly, was recently ruled out until the end of the season and before kick-off here, manager Mick McCarthy lost Championship Player of the Year and top goalscorer Sylvain Ebanks-Blake to a hamstring pull. Chris Iwelumo, the towering Scottish striker, can do a good job at this level, but when Birmingham's Lee Carsley went over the ball and hit him studs up after 37 minutes, it wasn't clear if he'd ever be able to do a job for anyone again. Iwelumo crumpled, Carsley froze and referee Mark Halsey took the only decision open to him by flashing a red card.
But the ten men of Birmingham still managed to open the scoring, albeit with the scrappiest goal of all time and I'm really not exaggerating. A lofted free-kick bounced off a series of heads and should have been dealt with by Wolves goalkeeper Wayne Hennessey, but the blonde stopper seemed strangely reticent. Waiting for the ball to come to him instead of rushing to claim it, he suddenly found himself entangled in a melee of players and, blindly reaching through the bodies for the ball, he could only clasp it with one hand against the groin of Birmingham striker Cameron Jerome. There was an awkward moment of silence, the kind that follows a sexist joke at a dinner party, and then Jerome sprang into action. Grabbing Hennessey's hand and holding it in place, he surged forward and pushed everyone into the back of the net, ball still stuck to what we shall diplomatically refer to as 'his lap'. Welcome to The Championship, where style is a state of mind.
Despite their one man advantage, Wolves just couldn't get back into the game. They scuffed passes, dawdled on the ball and gave possession away as if they'd been relegated the week before and had long since stopped caring. With 20 minutes to go, Birmingham striker Garry O'Connor raced onto another defensive error and skipped past Hennessey, sliding the ball into the empty net. McCarthy, who had been ranting and raving on the sidelines, fell silent. There are some things that even shouting won't solve. Wolves were shockingly bad.
As Premier League fans have found this season, it's difficult to predict how the new teams will cope at a higher level. Many observers, myself included, thought that last season's champions West Bromwich Albion would flourish in the top flight where their exciting, expansive style of play would fit in nicely. Instead it is the more basic qualities of Hull City, who came up through the play-offs, and Stoke City that seem set to survive. The flashy and flamboyant Baggies could be down by the end of the Easter period. With that in mind, both Wolves and Birmingham should cope just fine because you couldn't accuse either of them of being overburdened by flair. A lot can change after a summer of spending, but for the moment, there is little for the Premier League to fear from below.
Their creative right-winger, Michael Kightly, was recently ruled out until the end of the season and before kick-off here, manager Mick McCarthy lost Championship Player of the Year and top goalscorer Sylvain Ebanks-Blake to a hamstring pull. Chris Iwelumo, the towering Scottish striker, can do a good job at this level, but when Birmingham's Lee Carsley went over the ball and hit him studs up after 37 minutes, it wasn't clear if he'd ever be able to do a job for anyone again. Iwelumo crumpled, Carsley froze and referee Mark Halsey took the only decision open to him by flashing a red card.
But the ten men of Birmingham still managed to open the scoring, albeit with the scrappiest goal of all time and I'm really not exaggerating. A lofted free-kick bounced off a series of heads and should have been dealt with by Wolves goalkeeper Wayne Hennessey, but the blonde stopper seemed strangely reticent. Waiting for the ball to come to him instead of rushing to claim it, he suddenly found himself entangled in a melee of players and, blindly reaching through the bodies for the ball, he could only clasp it with one hand against the groin of Birmingham striker Cameron Jerome. There was an awkward moment of silence, the kind that follows a sexist joke at a dinner party, and then Jerome sprang into action. Grabbing Hennessey's hand and holding it in place, he surged forward and pushed everyone into the back of the net, ball still stuck to what we shall diplomatically refer to as 'his lap'. Welcome to The Championship, where style is a state of mind.
Despite their one man advantage, Wolves just couldn't get back into the game. They scuffed passes, dawdled on the ball and gave possession away as if they'd been relegated the week before and had long since stopped caring. With 20 minutes to go, Birmingham striker Garry O'Connor raced onto another defensive error and skipped past Hennessey, sliding the ball into the empty net. McCarthy, who had been ranting and raving on the sidelines, fell silent. There are some things that even shouting won't solve. Wolves were shockingly bad.
As Premier League fans have found this season, it's difficult to predict how the new teams will cope at a higher level. Many observers, myself included, thought that last season's champions West Bromwich Albion would flourish in the top flight where their exciting, expansive style of play would fit in nicely. Instead it is the more basic qualities of Hull City, who came up through the play-offs, and Stoke City that seem set to survive. The flashy and flamboyant Baggies could be down by the end of the Easter period. With that in mind, both Wolves and Birmingham should cope just fine because you couldn't accuse either of them of being overburdened by flair. A lot can change after a summer of spending, but for the moment, there is little for the Premier League to fear from below.
