Female Celebrities

[C C Csiders]

There are some female celebs out there that the media build up as being beautiful, but they are, in actual fact, complete mingers. My five against the field:

1. The woman who is the main character in Sex and the City - I don't know her name. She advertises Lux aswell. She is no beauty, take a look she is the spitting image of Mr Punch

2. Anna Kournikova. No, no, no! She is obviously the love-child of Boris Yeltsin

3. Natasha Kaplinsky (BBC Breakfast). Caked under 36 layers of foundation. Suffers from the same skin and flesh being too big for the skull condition of Harry Redknapp

4. Victoria Beckham. No explanation required

5. Jodie Marsh. What is that on top of your torso? You call that a face? Real Chamber of Horrors stuff.

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

Good shout there, can't really argue with those, although I don't find Jodie that minging. No5 for me would have to be that jumped up little tart, Kate Lawler. No doubt others will spring to mind as the week goes on, such as Gywneth Paltrow who absolutely does my box in!

 

[C C Csiders]

Quote[/b] (glasgowsufc @ Aug. 08 2005,13:40)]No doubt others will spring to mind as the week goes on, such as Gywneth Paltrow who absolutely does my box in!

As opposed to Chris Martin who does her box in.

 

[The General]

SOL's favourite Linsay Lohan is one of my current pet hates at the moment.

 

[Guest]

Would agree with pretty much all your selections there C C C siders, but maybe I'd swap Kournikova with Jodie Marsh - I see her around Brentwood sometimes, in the flesh she's REALLY bad!

 

[Matt the Shrimp]

Yep, a decent top 5. Your number 1 is Sarah Jessica Parker - and yes, she looks like Mr. Punch's Dog...

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

Quote[/b] (Matt the Shrimp @ Aug. 08 2005,16:42)]Yep, a decent top 5.  Your number 1 is Sarah Jessica Parker - and yes, she looks like Mr. Punch's Dog...

I'm not sure why but I always thought she was fit after her performance in Mars Attacks! but having suffered 10 seconds of S.&.t.C and her annoying ads I cannot now stand her.

Is she still married to Matthew Broderick?

 

[Matt the Shrimp]

Yep. Ah, poor Matthew... how did he go from being the coolest man on the planet (Ferris Bueller) to Mr. SJParker...?

 

[canveyshrimper]

Somebody said that Jodie Marsh had a nose like a builders elbow.

You seem to have forgotten Jo Brand the face that sank an armada, and the gobby thick fat tart off big brother.

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

Quote[/b] (canveyshrimper @ Aug. 08 2005,17:06)]You seem to have forgotten Jo Brand the face that sank an armada, and the gobby thick fat tart off big brother.

Yeah but Jo or "the bottle queen" aren't celebs who purport to be gorgeous but are in actual fact minging!

 

[Hong Kong Blue]

I'd disagree with Kournikova but would nominate the entire Spice Girls, not just Posh.

 

[blues_r_best]

Especially Baby spice.

 

[Sussex Shrimper]

Sophie Ellis-Bextor
Kat Slater from Eastenders
The Williams sisters

 

[The Artful Shrimper]

Sophie Ellis

Kat Slater

Zoe Slater

The slaggy one from emmerdale.
who's married to the footballer in real life. (Kelly windsor i've just been told)

Jordan Jodie or Paris Hilton take your pick.

Karen Black, old actress, she had weird eyes.

I've exceeded my quota haven't I.

 

[sismith]

Pink and esp. Avril Lavinge (sp) get far too much praise for awful grundgy looks.

 

[Xàbia Shrimper]

Definately Katie "Jordan" Price! Caked thick with make-up, how can any sane person find her attractive?!

WS

 

[Guest]

Quote[/b] (Xàbia Shrimper @ Aug. 08 2005,19:31)]Definately Katie "Jordan" Price! Caked thick with make-up, how can any sane person find her attractive?!

WS

Which is almost as bad as her hideous looking breasts. They're far too large and don't look even remotely real. How can anyone find that kind of thing attractive?

It's a shame because she wasn't that bad looking when she started out in 1997

 

[* ORM *]

Quote[/b] (Xàbia Shrimper @ Aug. 08 2005,19:31)]Definately Katie "Jordan" Price! Caked thick with make-up, how can any sane person find her attractive?!

WS

Spot on ! Other than the rest of the reconstructions ANYONE that feels the need to enhance their tits (unless for medical reasons) should automatically go on this list.

Paris Hilton ? Definitely

Sussex Shrimper mentioned the Williams sisters but I don't think either of these two purport to be anything other than non-lesbian tennis players (I stand to be corrected here).

Oh and most of the Spice Girls

(damn ! I bit)

 

[the leopard]

Kate Moss........
Naomi Campbell.....

 

[Kris]

Quote[/b] (Hong Kong Blue @ Aug. 08 2005,17:29)]I'd disagree with Kournikova but would nominate the entire Spice Girls, not just Posh.

Yep, I'd second that. The Spice Girls have never done anything for me whatsoever looks-wise and are no different from the average girl out on the lash on a Friday/Saturday night.