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Not In Mohave Shrimper

formerly Drastic™
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
8,833
Location
SS1
Denon AKDL1 Cable. A Cable worth $500. Read The Reviews. ;)

http://www.amazon.com/review/product/B000I1X6PM/ref=cm_cr_pr_link_1

"I wish that I could give this product the full five stars. Based on its ability to enhance the musical, spatial, temporal and spiritual qualities of any recording, it is worth many multiples of the reasonable asking price. Unfortunately, Denon does not provide the necessary warning regarding the directionality of the cable. As I write this email, a small black hole is tearing through the space time fabric of my living room, consuming everything in its path (including my former pet Chihuahua, Wolfgang)"

"I accidentally dropped one end of my Denon cable into a glass of Tuscan whole milk I was drinking. Later when I finished my milk (yeah, I still drank it; should I not have done that?), my right arm (lost in an accident in 1987) spontaneously grew back. Is that normal?"

"If Denon had captured the Divine light of creation and distiled it into 1.5 meters of ultramegaradioactive copper, it could not have been better than this cable. Just holding the packaging it comes in, I can see distant galaxies and, though you may not believe it, hear what the aliens there are thinking. THAT is how good this cable is. Just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes. Honestly, looking at it is better than foreplay. You feel wracking orgastic shivers just touching it. I just know that zeros and ones will achieve true integer perfection when they travel this cable. But I'm afraid to actually install it. I might die."
 

Ricey

Scott Forbes No.1 Fan⭐
Staff member
Joined
Dec 21, 2003
Messages
33,892
Location
Braintree
If I could use a rusty boxcutter to carve a new orifice in my body that's compatible with this link cable, I would already be doing it. I can just imagine the pure musical goodness that would flow through this cable into the wound and fill me completely -- like white, holy light. Holding this cable in my hands actually makes me feel that much closer to the Lord Jesus Christ. I only make $6.25/hr at Jack In The Box, but I saved up for three months so I could have this cable. It sits in a shrine I constructed next to my futon in Mother's basement.

I only gave it four stars in my review because I can't find music that is worthy enough to flow through this utterly perfect interconnect.


LMFAO! I think these people are taking the ****, good find there Jonny.
 

Not In Mohave Shrimper

formerly Drastic™
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
8,833
Location
SS1
“This cable does allow for incredible sound. However, I believe a possible side-effect from the use of this cable has not been noted by the manufacturers. Upon playing Prince's "Kiss" my speakers ... how should I put this? ... Well, I think they ... climaxed.

That's not the end of it. Oh, no. My stereo system is now sentient. And horny. Not one of my other appliances has warranty coverage for ... well ... the kind of 'damage' they are currently receiving.

I'd just unplug the darn thing, but it's developed an ability to arc pure energy when it feels threatened. It took two scorched electricians to figure that out. And, yes, I've already tried flipping the breaker switch. Doesn't work. The power won't go out. I don't understand how the hell it pulled that off.

Please, if anyone has any tips or advice, I'm getting desperate. My living room is some kind of sick, mechanical sex den and it's really freaking me out. “ :D :D :D
 
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