Slipperduke
The Camden Cad
I don't want to appear rude or patronising, but something has been bothering me for a while now and I need to get it off my chest. Does Manchester City's chief executive Garry Cook actually understand how football works? I only ask because the evidence is really starting to pile up now.
He accused AC Milan of 'bottling' the sale of Kaka, presumably in much the same way that Scarlett Johansson 'bottles' asking me out for dinner. He believes that the Premier League should have no relegation and contain only 10-14 clubs, a plan glibly supported by his claim that, "the fans would find a way to get passionate about it." This week, he's hit upon the idea of signing as many strikers as possible, because that's bound to work, isn't it? The more strikers you have, the more goals, right?
If the deal to sign Emmanuel Adebayor goes through as reported, Manchester City will have ten forwards on their books. Craig Bellamy, Benjani, Ched Evans, Felipe Caicedo, Robinho, Roque Santa Cruz, Valeri Bojinov and one Carlos Tevez. The tenth, last season's GBP20m striker Jo, has already been dispatched to Everton, but unless Mark Hughes is planning a revolutionary new formation, this is still going to end in tears. If four strikers make it into the matchday 18, that still leaves five sat in the stands, angrily texting their agents. Poor old Ched Evans, an international for Wales, could actually struggle to get a game for the reserves. Good God, City have got more strikers than defenders!
And then there's these wages. Cook's plan appears to be to throw money at people until they give up pointing at last season's league table and reluctantly put pen to paper. Raw cash is the basest of recruitment incentives. It's the the easiest way to get what you want, but it's fundamentally flawed. Sign Robinho for money and money alone and that is how his tenure will be defined. He is reported to earn GBP160,000 a week, less than the figures being bandied around for Tevez and Adebayor. What's the first thing that his agent will do if the signings are confirmed? Exactly, he'll be banging on Cook's door looking for a pay rise. And what of the other players? How will Nedum Onuoha and Stephen Ireland feel when their faithful service in troubled times is rewarded with a fraction of the newcomer's wages? If there's a faster way to split a dressing room than this disparate pay scale, I can't think of it. How will Adebayor's lethargic bottom-scratching go down when the rest of the squad know that he earns four or five times as much as them?
Money will eventually destroy this hubris-ridden ego-trip of a project. In the past, footballers wages could always be defended with one simple argument. If a club could afford to bear the cost, then why shouldn't they reward their players accordingly? But is this still the case? How are City ever going to recoup the kind of money they're throwing around? Win the league? Win the Champions League? How long will the Arab owners throw their money in without seeing any returns? Is there actually any plan beyond Cook emptying his wallet on the floor and seeing who scrambles for the big notes?
Tevez and Adebayor are both good players, but anyone with any knowledge of football can tell you that success in football is not derived purely from accumulated talent. You need a combination of stability, hard-work, determination and team spirit from a balanced squad of excellent professionals. With a top heavy team, a fractious dressing room and skyhigh expectations, it's hard to prophesise anything other than spectacular, ruinous failure for Manchester City.
He accused AC Milan of 'bottling' the sale of Kaka, presumably in much the same way that Scarlett Johansson 'bottles' asking me out for dinner. He believes that the Premier League should have no relegation and contain only 10-14 clubs, a plan glibly supported by his claim that, "the fans would find a way to get passionate about it." This week, he's hit upon the idea of signing as many strikers as possible, because that's bound to work, isn't it? The more strikers you have, the more goals, right?
If the deal to sign Emmanuel Adebayor goes through as reported, Manchester City will have ten forwards on their books. Craig Bellamy, Benjani, Ched Evans, Felipe Caicedo, Robinho, Roque Santa Cruz, Valeri Bojinov and one Carlos Tevez. The tenth, last season's GBP20m striker Jo, has already been dispatched to Everton, but unless Mark Hughes is planning a revolutionary new formation, this is still going to end in tears. If four strikers make it into the matchday 18, that still leaves five sat in the stands, angrily texting their agents. Poor old Ched Evans, an international for Wales, could actually struggle to get a game for the reserves. Good God, City have got more strikers than defenders!
And then there's these wages. Cook's plan appears to be to throw money at people until they give up pointing at last season's league table and reluctantly put pen to paper. Raw cash is the basest of recruitment incentives. It's the the easiest way to get what you want, but it's fundamentally flawed. Sign Robinho for money and money alone and that is how his tenure will be defined. He is reported to earn GBP160,000 a week, less than the figures being bandied around for Tevez and Adebayor. What's the first thing that his agent will do if the signings are confirmed? Exactly, he'll be banging on Cook's door looking for a pay rise. And what of the other players? How will Nedum Onuoha and Stephen Ireland feel when their faithful service in troubled times is rewarded with a fraction of the newcomer's wages? If there's a faster way to split a dressing room than this disparate pay scale, I can't think of it. How will Adebayor's lethargic bottom-scratching go down when the rest of the squad know that he earns four or five times as much as them?
Money will eventually destroy this hubris-ridden ego-trip of a project. In the past, footballers wages could always be defended with one simple argument. If a club could afford to bear the cost, then why shouldn't they reward their players accordingly? But is this still the case? How are City ever going to recoup the kind of money they're throwing around? Win the league? Win the Champions League? How long will the Arab owners throw their money in without seeing any returns? Is there actually any plan beyond Cook emptying his wallet on the floor and seeing who scrambles for the big notes?
Tevez and Adebayor are both good players, but anyone with any knowledge of football can tell you that success in football is not derived purely from accumulated talent. You need a combination of stability, hard-work, determination and team spirit from a balanced squad of excellent professionals. With a top heavy team, a fractious dressing room and skyhigh expectations, it's hard to prophesise anything other than spectacular, ruinous failure for Manchester City.