C C Csiders
Life President
Firstly, I apologise in advance for sharing this with you (you may feel it too much information!). However, I now feel I know, in a virtual sense, you all on here. Indeed, for what I am about to shar e with you, I could say that I have shared the SZ urinal with you with DtS one side, Slipperduke the other, with CS J looking over my shoulder booing.
Anyway, sitting in the Doctor's surgery this morning for a mild, but persistent back pain (caused by attempting an overhead kick playing football with my son) the buzzer goes off for my turn. I walk in to the Dr's room and sat there is a rather gorgeous (youngish) Asian female doctor. Behind her I catch a glance of her computer screen; and there on the screen is my full medical history from birth onwards. My eyes are immediately drawn to the top line, and there almost glowing and flashing (seemingly in 20 point font) it says:
21/10/65 Standard Circumcision
That's it I think, this beautiful woman knows all about what's hidden in my trousers. How do I feel about this? Well, at first, I must admit it's a bit of a turn-on. I even think I felt a bit of a 'lob' coming on. But, almost immediately other thoughts spring into my head.
"Standard," what do they mean "Standard"? I didn't know circumcision came in various categories. What other categories could there be in this ancient 'art'? You must be able to get a De Luxe. If so, where do you get a De Luxe one done? Is it only available privately? Are the working classes discriminated against when it comes to whipping off the foreskin? Why did my parents not belong to BUPA? I'd rather have fancied the De Luxe.
But then, bloody hell! Come to think of it, if that down there is "Standard", what the hell is an Economy one like? I'd hate to see that. What must it be like to go into the hospital and await the Economy slice? Do they do it without anaesthetic? Do they only carry them out at failing hospitals? Is your knob wrapped in a blue and white striped bandage until it (eventually) heals?
After all that, I couldn't remember what the Dr told me about my back, but I'm sure she filed it on her computer at the bottom of my records.
Anyway, sitting in the Doctor's surgery this morning for a mild, but persistent back pain (caused by attempting an overhead kick playing football with my son) the buzzer goes off for my turn. I walk in to the Dr's room and sat there is a rather gorgeous (youngish) Asian female doctor. Behind her I catch a glance of her computer screen; and there on the screen is my full medical history from birth onwards. My eyes are immediately drawn to the top line, and there almost glowing and flashing (seemingly in 20 point font) it says:
21/10/65 Standard Circumcision
That's it I think, this beautiful woman knows all about what's hidden in my trousers. How do I feel about this? Well, at first, I must admit it's a bit of a turn-on. I even think I felt a bit of a 'lob' coming on. But, almost immediately other thoughts spring into my head.
"Standard," what do they mean "Standard"? I didn't know circumcision came in various categories. What other categories could there be in this ancient 'art'? You must be able to get a De Luxe. If so, where do you get a De Luxe one done? Is it only available privately? Are the working classes discriminated against when it comes to whipping off the foreskin? Why did my parents not belong to BUPA? I'd rather have fancied the De Luxe.
But then, bloody hell! Come to think of it, if that down there is "Standard", what the hell is an Economy one like? I'd hate to see that. What must it be like to go into the hospital and await the Economy slice? Do they do it without anaesthetic? Do they only carry them out at failing hospitals? Is your knob wrapped in a blue and white striped bandage until it (eventually) heals?
After all that, I couldn't remember what the Dr told me about my back, but I'm sure she filed it on her computer at the bottom of my records.