National cashpoint failure

[Mad Cyril]

I'm not one to spread unfounded alarmist rumours but a colleague has just informed me (after phoning his bank) that there is a national cashpoint failure affecting all banks.

If anyone could confirm this before I go and loot the Canary Wharf B and O shop I would be appreciate it.

 

[SUFC_Al]

I could only withdraw cash from a cashpoint at my bank this morning, it seems the Link system is fooked.

 

[Desert Shrimper]

This country is ****ed blah blah blah it's a disgrace blah blah blah

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

This country is ****ed blah blah blah it's a disgrace blah blah blah

I blame the coloureds. And the commies. And the Jews.

 

[Gremlin]

You know what the problem is, don't you? The government has given all the money out in benefits to immigrants already.

 

[Desert Shrimper]

The Daily Mail Forum

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

Yeah, you're probably right. I think it's the germans too. I mean, they've been awfully quiet recently. And I've never trusted those Belgiums neither.

What I want to know is, when the country really needs the heavy hitters, where the **** are people like Richard Stilgoe? Eh? Derek Griffiths? Bob Holness?
F***ing nowhere, that's where. The lazy c***s.
These people take, take, take but when it's time to give something back, they vanish into thin air.
It makes me sick.

Griffiths did so much for race relations in this country with his loveable light-skinned clown schtick that he is enjoying a well earned rest. The others need to saddle up and save us. Particularly Holness. Who didn't play saxophone on 'Baker Street'. Or did he?

 

[McNasty]

Griffiths did so much for race relations in this country with his loveable light-skinned clown schtick that he is enjoying a well earned rest. The others need to saddle up and save us. Particularly Holness. Who didn't play saxophone on 'Baker Street'. Or did he?

Can I have a P please Bob ?

 

[MrB]

I believe Bob Holness is currently trafficking illegal immigrants into the country with the specific intentions of taking your jobs.

 

[please delete my account]

What about Johnny Ball or Carol Vorderman? They're good with numbers. They would be useful if they could get off their fat arses and help out.
Eddie Kidd's not doing much either. I know he can't get around as well as he used to, but that's no f***ing excuse.

 

[Yorkshire Blue]

Griffiths did so much for race relations in this country with his loveable light-skinned clown schtick that he is enjoying a well earned rest. The others need to saddle up and save us. Particularly Holness. Who didn't play saxophone on 'Baker Street'. Or did he?

Dean Holness might as well have been playing saxophone at Baker Street for all he did for us. At least his busking might have paid his wages.

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

What about Johnny Ball or Carol Vorderman? They're good with numbers. They would be useful if they could get off their fat arses and help out.
Eddie Kidd's not doing much either. I know he can't get around as well as he used to, but that's no f***ing excuse.

Zoe Ball and Vorderman can help me straighten out my Longfellow - Johnny might as well have jumped in the hole with Alan.

As for Eddie Kidd, I'm not sure what that bird Stacie Smith (the one where he used to have a timeshare arrangement with Paul Young) is up to, but I know she's local and looks like she could do a turn.

The cashpoints may still be fooked, but I would be inserting something and then pulling it out after an efficient transaction.

 

[sufc_tom]

I managed to get money out from a link machine at the BP garage behind Roots Hall today.

 

[Desert Shrimper]

I managed to get money out from a link machine at the BP garage behind Roots Hall today.

Who do you know who "greased the wheels"? This ****ing country has one rule for the elite and another for the rest of us. Alright for you but what about the rest of us who are left to swim in S**T??

 

[osymandus]

I got money out of Rochford station cashpoiint ?

 

[Cricko]

I got money out of Rochford station cashpoiint ?

Maybe,but I bet you summoned Bahamut to aid you..;)

 

[osymandus]

Maybe,but I bet you summoned Bahamut to aid you..;)

No .. a sledge hammer :) Baph was on her date ;)

 

[please delete my account]

Morning Chaps,

I don't really know what the problem is. So, the cashpoints were buggered. Don't matter.
Next time, just do what I do - Deck some old biddy coming out of the post office and nick her tartan trolley thing, after rifling through her handbag and pockets of course..

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

The cashpoints are still malfunctioning. I tried to obtain £200 this morning but I was rebuffed on the flimsy pretext that there was only £3.32 in my account.