Parents - Teenagers or Toddlers?

[Joolz]

A question to all the Mums & Dads out there who have teenage kids. I was thinking the other day how much I love being a Dad to my kids (6, 4, & 2), and then started wondering if it all goes pear shaped once they hit puberty? There seem so many more things to worry about - drugs, fights, and the inevitable moodiness. So what are the benefits of teenage kids over toddlers (if any)? Can you still talk to them? Can you still have a laugh together? Does the fact that they pretty much look after themselves far outweigh the grief of younger kids, or do you secretly wish they were little again?

I'm looking for some reassurance here if possible!

 

[osymandus]

Im not a praent , but surly teh advantage of teenages is they can carry things .
Damn you child labours laws i could have had a convoy of toddlers paning europe by now grrr !!!

Oh and the moodiness . just remember they really cant help it , neurologists discovered recently that as the brain basicly rewires itself and hormones on top a mood swing here or there is sadly a natural thing to occur.

 

[Aberdeen Shrimper]

A question to all the Mums & Dads out there who have teenage kids. I was thinking the other day how much I love being a Dad to my kids (6, 4, & 2), and then started wondering if it all goes pear shaped once they hit pubey? There seem so many more things to worry about - drugs, fights, and the inevitable moodiness. So what are the benefits of teenage kids over toddlers (if any)? Can you still talk to them? Can you still have a laugh together? Does the fact that they pretty much look after themselves far outweigh the grief of younger kids, or do you secretly wish they were little again?

I'm looking for some reassurance here if possible!

Interesting question Joolz

The only person i can see hitting Pubey is OBL...

:whistling:

What about people like Cricko who have Teenage grandchildren? How do they cope with it all as well

 

[Rayleigh Weir]

A question to all the Mums & Dads out there who have teenage kids. I was thinking the other day how much I love being a Dad to my kids (6, 4, & 2), and then started wondering if it all goes pear shaped once they hit puberty? There seem so many more things to worry about - drugs, fights, and the inevitable moodiness. So what are the benefits of teenage kids over toddlers (if any)? Can you still talk to them? Can you still have a laugh together? Does the fact that they pretty much look after themselves far outweigh the grief of younger kids, or do you secretly wish they were little again?

I'm looking for some reassurance here if possible!

My experience is with fostered kids rather than my own, but it's quite cool when they start genuinely getting into stuff that you like - music, films, activities etc. Plus it's good to be able to do some of the more adult stuff that you really want to do under the guise of spending time with the kids...

 

[Firestorm]

Sure teenagers bring a whole new batch of problems, School issues, crap boyfriends, underage drinking etc but to be honest its just different stresses. Terrible two's vs adolescent misery both were much the same.
You can relate more to them when they are older.

The worse bit is having had moments of looking forward to them leaving home, when they eventually do go the place feels so empty

 

[madaboutblues]

Sure teenagers bring a whole new batch of problems, School issues, crap boyfriends, underage drinking etc but to be honest its just different stresses. Terrible two's vs adolescent misery both were much the same.
You can relate more to them when they are older.

The worse bit is having had moments of looking forward to them leaving home, when they eventually do go the place feels so empty

I agree FS. Can't live with them, can't live without them!!

Seriously though, my two are now 19 and 15. They fight like cat and dog but this year was the first year we went on holiday without our eldest and we all missed him even his sister.

Also they are much better company at the footie - no fidgeting or "I'm bored" to put up with!!

 

[OldBlueLady]

There are times when you honestly feel like you could cheerfully murder them but others when they make you feel like the best parent in the world. It's like any stage really, they have their ups and they have their downs, these just change as they get older. From a mum's perspective, it's easier to get on with my son because we share our love of football, and because he has come through the "worst" years, and my daughter is right in the middle of them! Girls fight more with their mums than boys in my experience, and the trouble is you then have a double dose of hormones battling from opposite sides. Having said that, when we catch each other's eye at someone wearing something strange or something silly on the tv and you know you share the same sense of humour, you have a connection that you didn't have with them as a youngster.

I love them both to bits and am proud of them no matter what, but to coin a phrase, like I say, they drive you mad at times!

 

[Benfleet A1]

I have always adhered to the Homer Simpson school of thought on this.

'When they turn 18, they are out the door'

14 years and counting.

 

[Irish_Shrimper]

What about people like Cricko who have Teenage great great grandchildren? How do they cope with it all as well

Edited for accuracy ;)

 

[shrimpfan]

kids are for life!!!!!! your see!!!!

 

[Joolz]

Thanks for the words of encouragement everyone. I think I was having a confidence crisis yesterday - when everything is going so well you start to wonder when it is all going to go wrong!

The bottom line is of course dependent on the teenager themselves. 'Yoof' of today get a pretty bad press IMO - generally I don't think much has changed for the majority, it's just that the bad ones seem a lot worse than the bad ones in my day.

I just hope mine don't end up being like my sister who, although I love her to bits, was an absolute nightmare for my parents, and to some extent still is even though she is nearly 50!

 

[Mad Cyril]

I think they are much worse as toddlers.

When they reach five you can stick them in an austere military boarding school and relax.