The divorced mate conundrum

[MK Shrimper]

All,

Me & Mrs MK have a group of friends that we go out with every so often....trouble is one is now seperated from his wife and going through a divorce. What would be the ettiquette here?

1) Send out the invite and make him feel bad that his marriage is in the process of ending.
2) Don't invite and feel like we're shunning him (especially if he finds out).

Ahh, the moral conundrum!

 

[Pubey]

All,

Me & Mrs MK have a group of friends that we go out with every so often....trouble is one is now seperated from his wife and going through a divorce. What would be the ettiquette here?

1) Send out the invite and make him feel bad that his marriage is in the process of ending.
2) Don't invite and feel like we're shunning him (especially if he finds out).

Ahh, the moral conundrum!

Invite him.

 

[londonblue]

Invite him.

No question. It's up to him if he accepts or not, but to not invite him just because of his situation is simply wrong.

We had a friend in the same position when we got married. He was obviously invited, but we made sure is "bitch from hell" (now) ex knew she wasn't invited.

Apparently she was upset with us!

 

[WightShrimper]

You invite both, but add a personal note that their significant other has also been invited. It is then up to them to decide whether they want to attend. That way, hopefully, you do not put your own friendships at risk.
I have always hated the 'taking sides' that can happen after a divorce. I have found that by maintaining a Swiss stance on these situations usually ends up with things sorting themselves out without too much bloodshed.

 

[londonblue]

You invite both, but add a personal note that their significant other has also been invited. It is then up to them to decide whether they want to attend. That way, hopefully, you do not put your own friendships at risk.
I have always hated the 'taking sides' that can happen after a divorce. I have found that by maintaining a Swiss stance on these situations usually ends up with things sorting themselves out without too much bloodshed.

That would be the right stance if you're friendly with both, but the original post gives the impression they're only friendly with one side...

 

[MK Shrimper]

You invite both, but add a personal note that their significant other has also been invited. It is then up to them to decide whether they want to attend. That way, hopefully, you do not put your own friendships at risk.
I have always hated the 'taking sides' that can happen after a divorce. I have found that by maintaining a Swiss stance on these situations usually ends up with things sorting themselves out without too much bloodshed.

Oh she won't get an invite with or without him. My other friends will bring their other halves - I just though it maybe a touchy subject if he comes alone.

That would be the right stance if you're friendly with both, but the original post gives the impression they're only friendly with one side...

Spot on LB.

 

[Napster]

Invite him. No question.

 

[Uncle Leo]

Seems like a straightforward one to me - invite him.

 

[MK Shrimper]

I shall. Hopefully he'll bring along a foxy vixen who's been helping him through his tricky divorce :smile:

 

[DTS]

All,

Me & Mrs MK have a group of friends that we go out with every so often....trouble is one is now seperated from his wife and going through a divorce. What would be the ettiquette here?

1) Send out the invite and make him feel bad that his marriage is in the process of ending.
2) Don't invite and feel like we're shunning him (especially if he finds out).

Ahh, the moral conundrum!

Invite him for sure. Why would you not?

He may be glad of the company and if not he can politely decline.

(Have based this answer on basis its not a swingers party you are going too? If it is don't invite him as the general etiquette I believe is to have a least as many women as men).

 

[Pubey]

Is his wife fit?

 

[MK Shrimper]

(Have based this answer on basis its not a swingers party you are going too? If it is don't invite him as the general etiquette I believe is to have a least as many women as men).

Lol, it'll be a curry and a beer or two. Pants will be definitely staying on.

 

[MK Shrimper]

Is his wife fit?

Soon to be ex? ....bit of a typical Essex "bird". Seems to have found religion late in life.

 

[londonblue]

That would be the right stance if you're friendly with both, but the original post gives the impression they're only friendly with one side...

Spot on Jam.

You what????

 

[MK Shrimper]

You what????

Oops. Sorry. :blush:

 

[OldBlueLady]

I can tell you that it's a horrible feeling thinking your friends are shunning you simply because you're separated (or divorced) or now single. If you're no longer part of a couple then that shouldn't be a reason not to be invited somewhere.

 

[Pubey]

I can tell you that it's a horrible feeling thinking your friends are shunning you simply because you're separated (or divorced) or now single. If you're no longer part of a couple then that shouldn't be a reason not to be invited somewhere.

But it sounds like MK is part of a swingers club and they don't want odd numbers.

 

[OldBlueLady]

But it sounds like MK is part of a swingers club and they don't want odd numbers.

Easy. Find another single then!

 

[undercovershrimper]

Invite them both, shag her!

 

[* ORM *]

But it sounds like MK is part of a swingers club and they don't want odd numbers.

Ha ha. Quality.