• Welcome to the ShrimperZone forums.
    You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which only gives you limited access.

    Existing Users:.
    Please log-in using your existing username and password. If you have any problems, please see below.

    New Users:
    Join our free community now and gain access to post topics, communicate privately with other members, respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and free. Click here to join.

    Fans from other clubs
    We welcome and appreciate supporters from other clubs who wish to engage in sensible discussion. Please feel free to join as above but understand that this is a moderated site and those who cannot play nicely will be quickly removed.

    Assistance Required
    For help with the registration process or accessing your account, please send a note using the Contact us link in the footer, please include your account name. We can then provide you with a new password and verification to get you on the site.

Top 10 things we lie about

Ok Pinocchios, which have you lied about?

  • Your age

    Votes: 11 39.3%
  • The amount of booze you've quaffed

    Votes: 17 60.7%
  • The number of sexual partners you've had

    Votes: 5 17.9%
  • If you've had surgery to "improve" your appearance

    Votes: 1 3.6%
  • Your boring old job

    Votes: 4 14.3%
  • "Improving" your CV

    Votes: 12 42.9%
  • Exaggerating how often you have sex (in a relationship)

    Votes: 4 14.3%
  • Your connections

    Votes: 3 10.7%
  • How much you earn

    Votes: 5 17.9%
  • Concealing illness or past diseases

    Votes: 5 17.9%

  • Total voters
    28
  • Poll closed .

OldBlueLady

Junior Blues Coordinator⭐⭐
Joined
Dec 27, 2007
Messages
50,767
Location
Benfleet
Apparently this is the top 10 things we, collectively, lie about. Thought it would be fun to see which on here has been lied about most - anonymously, of course!

1. Age - funny one this, at Eggheads, young Hutton turned round to me and said I thought you'd lie about that! Never occurred to me, I might be evasive but I don't actually think I look my age. No need to be rude now, please!

2. Alcohol Consumption - ok, this one I think many of us are a little bit guilty of, or maybe that's just me on this occasion.

3. Sexual History - apparently blokes knock the old notches up a bit and girls do the opposite! Shocking!

4. Falsifying or Changing Appearance - bit of botox, boob job, liposuction?

5. Job - who is stuck in a boring job and tries to make it more glamorous to sound more interesting?

6. Embellishing your CV - claiming far more than you actually have achieved!

7. How often you have sex - apparently this is something that is vastly over exaggerated by both men and women in relationships!

8. Connections - claiming false familial links or others (think I might keep quiet here)

9. Exaggerating your wages - yes, ok, I earn peanuts, no point in pretending otherwise!

10. Finally, concealing an illness or past disease - potentially problematic depending on what it is, but apparently this just scraps into the Top 10. STD anyone?
 
Last edited:
You missed off your obvious dislike of a certain Southend player with Mac in his name!!


:whistling:
 
You missed off your obvious dislike of a certain Southend player with Mac in his name!!


:whistling:

Don't think that quite made the top 10, Rich! I'm just obviously a very honest person, and everyone else seems to be a little bit scared! It's anonymous people!
 
Age - tried once for Matrix Revolutions. Glad it didn't work. Saw it on DVD instead. Much better.

Alcohol Consumption - don't drink.

Sexual History - never have.

Falsifying or Changing Appearence - never had to. Will never want to as well.

Job - never had a proper one. (Paper round not withstanding).

Embellishing CV - I will admit, I have... accidently put the wrong letter next to a few GCSEs... An A in Science when I was lucky to get a D, for example... It was only for a college assignment though, not a real job. I wouldn't do that.

Sexual Frequency - See above related answer.

Connections - Never have (although I do have a fair few famous ones by association).

Exaggerating Wages - Have never had a wage to exaggerate. Although a friend did agree to falsify a survey back in my GNVQ IT days and put me down for a fiver's pocket money a week when I actually got diddly squat.

Concealing Illness or Past Disease - Never have. I tend to keep the Asthma and Dyspraxia on the QT, but I don't lie about not having them.
 
Morning Chaps!

I must confess to stretching the truth on one or two matters..
For example: the four biker dudes I beat the crap out of in the Hamlet boozer a while ago, well, I didn't use my schlong as I had claimed, I used a brick and some metal piping.

Also, I have frequently lied about the size of my penis.
It's 8 1/2 inches long, not the 28 inch monster I had previously stated. I have also never lassooed anything with it.

Kind regards
 
5. Job - who is stuck in a boring job and tries to make it more glamorous to sound more interesting?

I work in Life Insurance. I find my job quite interesting but it's impossible to make it sound interesting in conversation.

I guess I could try embellishing it a bit- 'I bring a bit of financial comfort to people when they lose someone close to them'?
 
1. Age - Nope, never

2. Alcohol Consumption - Yes, usually when asked by a Doctor

3. Sexual History - Nope, never lied about that.

4. Falsifying or Changing Appearance - No

5. Job - No, my job is dull and I tell people exactly that.

6. Embellishing your CV - Yes, who hasn't?

7. How often you have sex - Not a topic of conversation I have, so no for me.

8. Connections - I have no connections to lie about

9. Exaggerating your wages - No, not a topic of conversation I ever have

10. Finally, concealing an illness or past disease - No
 
Alarmingly none of them.

1. Age - No, why?

2. Alcohol Consumption - Nope, anyone who judges you based on what you drink isn't worth knowing anyway.

3. Sexual History - Nope. See above.

4. Falsifying or Changing Appearance - No, quite happy to age naturally.

5. Job - No, what's the point in having a **** job if you can't moan about it?

6. Embellishing your CV - No, which possibly explains no5/9.

7. How often you have sex - Not something I generally talk about.

8. Connections - I have no connections to lie about

9. Exaggerating your wages - My wages are crap and I'm often to be found complaining about it.

10. Finally, concealing an illness or past disease - I don't lie or conceal these, that said you wouldn't just go up to someone and tell them your complete medical history. If it comes up in conversation I'd say.
 
Well, our top 3 look like

1) the amount of booze we've quaffed (2)
2) improving our CV and (6)
3) our age (1)
What an incredibly boring lot we are!
 
Back
Top