Why I Hate the French

[Benfleet A1]

It has long been known that I hate the French and I have often been asked why that is so. Well here it is,

Charles De Gaulle, port blockades, burning sheep, Sangatte, cheap wine, Napoleon, bone idle farmers, mime artists, Renault, Charles De Gaulle, French military tactics, awful army, worse navy, Golden Delicious, lack of personal hygiene, William the Conqueror, Trust, Charles De Gaulle, Peugeot, boules, snails(the eating of) Gendarmes, The Eiffel Tower, berets, they sank Rainbow Warrior, 35% of them are registered Communists, they keep banning our beef, they like Jerry Lewis, poodles, the women shave less than the men, Citroen, Charles De Gaulle, they cheat in referendum's, foie gras, they allow their dogs to poo everywhere and won't clear it up, they are rude (Paris Syndrome is considered a medical term for what visitors suffer for the ignorance of the locals) their ice skating judges are corrupt and did I mention Charles De Gaulle.

So there you have it, I think you will agree perfectly just reasons for hating the French.

 

[OldBlueLady]

Yes, maybe, but surely Christophe and Laurent go some way to appeasing that lot?

 

[Uncle Leo]

€10 for a half litre of Kronenbourg.

 

[Cricko]

I would say that the only thing that ruins France is the fact French people live there..;)

 

[MK Shrimper]

Lille was nice though. Mussell and Frites!

 

[OldBlueLady]

Lille was nice though. Mussell and Frites!

With mayo?

 

[MK Shrimper]

Sure I must have done!

 

[RobM]

Much better to have Harlow, trilbies, recession, knife crime, rubbish cheese, awful wine, plunging currency, boom and bust, Harlow, mass unemployment, trains that are totally unreliable, potholed roads, £120 a month rates, Harlow, Austin Allegros, Col Ewe, M25, Christopher Biggins, Eastenders and Harlow.

 

[Nobby Snide]

I would say that the only thing that ruins France is the fact French people live there..;)

a bit like America, in my experience too

 

[Nobby Snide]

Much better to have Harlow, trilbies, recession, knife crime, rubbish cheese, awful wine, plunging currency, boom and bust, Harlow, mass unemployment, trains that are totally unreliable, potholed roads, £120 a month rates, Harlow, Austin Allegros, Col Ewe, M25, Christopher Biggins, Eastenders and Harlow.

Harlow was never as bad as Basil-dildo-don

 

[canveyshrimper]

You missed cardboard apples, sweaty sock cheeses, rabid foxes and benzedrine wines, and I am fairly certain you didn't mention Charles de Gaulle.

 

[South Bank Hank]

I find myself impossibly torn on this thread...

 

[chadded]

Exactly, and who do we have?

 

[chadded]

I always find it funny if you go to google and search 'French military victories' then press I'm feeling lucky...

 

[Hotman]

a bit like America, in my experience too

Do lots of French live there too?

 

[RobM]

Equally blank - "French Bombed Cities"!

 

[BaileytheQuitter]

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/victories.html

Classic! :D

If it doesn't work, go on google and type in-

French Military victories,

Then click the 'feeling lucky' option.

Brilliant! :D

 

[Swiss Tony]

You missed cardboard apples, sweaty sock cheeses, rabid foxes and benzedrine wines, and I am fairly certain you didn't mention Charles de Gaulle.

Please give de gaulle some credit,he did try and keep us out the EEC,that famous word of his NON.

 

[slimshaney]

Northern France is a nice place and the people are friendly, you could look at England in the same way as you did france.

Deep fat fried mars bars, looks of fat people, not well dresses, Gordon Brown, Labour spin, X Factor, recession, knife crime, rubbish cheese, awful wine, plunging currency, Gordon Brown, boom and bust, Harlow, mass unemployment, trains that are totally unreliable, potholed roads, Gordon Brown, handing pots of money to poles and leaving oap’s no money for heating, Gordon Brown.

 

[RobM]

Oh - and Harlow!