Can anyone actually translate what was said on the radio as i am at work and it wont play for some reason.
Thanks
No problem, here goes :
Nick Alliker : Well, a terrible defeat for The Blluuueeess today and I have Southend's manager, Phil Brown, alongside me. Phil, you must be very disappointed?
Phil Brown : Aye, I am.
NA : What went wrong?
PB : Well, like, they are a top team and pulverized us into the dirt. We lost all 10 outfield battles.
NA : Why was that?
PB : I don't know, man. I told them what to do and they didn't carry out my instructions at all.
NA : ... and what about poor Ted Smith?
PB : Aye, I feel sorry for the lad. I stuck him in, hoping for an easy game and this lot just wouldn't stop shooting at him. Bullying that is. I told their manager so and the referee, but they wouldn't listen.
NA : You rested Dan Bentley ........
* phone rings *
PB : Can I just get this?
NA : OK, no problem
PB : Hello.
DH : .....
PB : Aye, hi Dean, I mean, er , Don
DH : ....
PB : Yes, I'm OK for tonight
DH : ....
PB : No, we lost 4-1
DH : ....
PB : Aye, yep I left them both on the bench like you suggested
DH : ....
PB : Yep, they'll be coming along tonight, too
DH : ....
PB : I haven't forgotten that Ken is taking us all to Trotters nightclub
DH : ....
PB : Yes, I know he's small, but he's brought his ID with him
DH : ....
PB : Yep, see you later
PB : Sorry about that, just Don Handsworth wanting me to meet up with a player I might be interested in called Ken Anderton. Plays for Leigh RMI. Anyway, where were we?
NA : A lot of supporters are worried about rumours involving your potential move to Bolton?
PB : Well, let me tell them straight that we always use the Whites Hotel before all our Northern matches. It's working a treat. We stayed there before today's match, Blackpool, Rochdale, Port Vale, Bradford and even Morecambe last season. It galvanizes the players.
NA : But, we lost all those matches.
PB : Er, have you got any more questions? I'm a busy man, me. Channel 5 want me to ramble on about Oldham v Crewe.
NA : Yes, what do you say to the fans who travelled today?
PB : Well, I'd like to buy them all a pint.
NA : All 597 of them?
PB : Blimey, was it that many? .. OK, let's say a half each and cokes for the kids, eh!
NA : A kind gesture, Phil
PB : Well, I'm all heart me. I'll even sing to them if they like.
NA : I don't think there's any need for that. Thanks again Phil and one last question. Do you intend to make changes for the final two matches?
PB : Well, man, I've been in football all me life and I can't stand slackers, show boaters, loan players with an attitude problem, people who disagree with me, players who won't shake my hand when I substitute them, players who feign an injury when I drop them, those who won't sign a contract and that bloke from Ipswich whose name I cannae pronounce.
NA : That's a long list, Phil.
PB : Aye, as a result, I've asked if Bradford would be happy with a six-a-side game next week.
* phone rings again *
PB : Gotta dash, It's Brian Horton. He says I've got the keys to the changing room. I'd forgotten I'd locked them all in there again!