All-time Southend comedy XI

[Farmer Fossett]

Can’t believe Jason Lee is not mentioned if only for his hair! He has a pineapple on his head is one of the best chants ever!

 

[AndyT]

What a joke Colin Murphy was. He signed that Collymore fella and saved us from relegation.. Joker

Let's be honest, though, some of the football under him was dire to watch!

 

[fbm]

Wee Davie Cunningham.

A small, combative player, he was coming on as a sub on one occasion. This was in the days of only one sub.

He ran on, immediately fouled an opponent in the centre circle and was promptly sent off. It all took about 30 seconds.

Classic.

 

[davewebbsbrain]

Let's be honest, though, some of the football under him was dire to watch!

Watching Collymore play was such a massive positive that I forget how Murphy style of play was

 

[AndyT]

Yep, totally agree.

Collymore fitted our style of play perfectly, under Murphy.

Got it upfield early to him and let him run with it.

 

[LBBlue]

Alan Glover lasted 30 seconds on his debut on loan from WBA .

I can remember that - it was right in front of me in the West Stand. It was a rearranged game against Hereford and the pitch was covered in snow. He came on as sub was out on the touch line and tried to control the first pass to him - his standing leg slipped in the snow and he ended up needing a cartilage operation - must be the shortest appearance ever.

 

[Member]

Lee Badbuy scoring after Roycey smashed a clearance from point blank range at him.

Alan McCormack - if he wasn't screaming at the ref, scything down opponents, scoring a worldy and then skipping matches to go out on the ****, he was headbutting Bailey in a match and decking Moussa on the training ground.

 

[LBBlue]

Mark Prudhoe and Carl Emberson must run Mel mighty close.

 

[LBBlue]

Yep, totally agree.

Collymore fitted our style of play perfectly, under Murphy.

Got it upfield early to him and let him run with it.

Upfield only needed to be as far as the half way line!

 

[LBBlue]

Peter Taylor going in goal against Cambridge after Derek Bellotti got injured.....

 

[NZamba Legend]

Mark Prudhoe and Carl Emberson must run Mel mighty close.

Embo was a real roly-poly keeper. His hands were bigger than dinner plates and you could see he doubled up on portions. Many tried but no one could replace Daryl.

 

[LBBlue]

Stuart Thurgood was a complete joke.

The mighty Bombhead ...

 

[LCBB72]

Mark Prudhoe and Carl Emberson must run Mel mighty close.

You never saw Brian Lloyd then .

 

[LCBB72]

Let's be honest, though, some of the football under him was dire to watch!

Dick Bate just edges it .

 

[united we stand]

Gareth Risbridgers sole appearance will be for ever in my memory, Mental ...

Other comedy moments . The Free kick routine where the player running over the ball didn't get out of the way quick enough (Was it Ling and Ansah ?)
A Free Kick being rolled to Frank Lampard who promptly fell over .
The Return of Kohn Keeley , facing a penalty in front of the North Bank he is getting untold abuse , The Penalty hits the bar and Rockets skyward, Kelley jumps to his feet and pops behind the goal to give it to the home fans, mean while the ball plummets to earth and into the 6 yard box , all hell breaks out as Brighton try to clear their lines as the Northbak continue to keep JK occupied.
Cocky ball boy who leapt like a salmon to take a shot from a Wimbledon player , only to catch it superbly and get carried over the wall and into the southbank

Just remembered a Tranmere winger on an icy Roots hall, being thrown the ball to take a corner at the south, losing is footing on the ice slope and doing a comedy slide into the perimeter wall

If the ball boy incident was around 28 years ago it was hullbridge sports u/12s (or there abouts). The ball boys name was Stephen Hillis and he was our keeper, I was in front of the West stand. He was fine.😀

 

[LBBlue]

You never saw Brian Lloyd then .

Plenty of times - trouble was when he went to Wrexham every time he came back to Roots Hall he was brilliant and ended up with 3 full caps and around 650 league games.

 

[AndyT]

Upfield only needed to be as far as the half way line!

Yep, that Huddersfield away goal typified Colly at his best!

 

[rigsby]

If the ball boy incident was around 28 years ago it was hullbridge sports u/12s (or there abouts). The ball boys name was Stephen Hillis and he was our keeper, I was in front of the West stand. He was fine.

If he has a dad called Terry, might that not be 38 years ago.

 

[Rattus Norvegicus]

Billy Paynter for his headless chicken routine every match. :sad:

 

[steve nead]

does anyone remember Peter Woods? He played left-midfield in 72-73. We went to Swansea and he played like Bambi on ice until he suddenly went down injured with no one near him. Our players were so embarrassed they were apologising to the Swansea players. Still managed a 1-1 draw which made the journey home better!