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Uncle Leo

This cook is an anti-semite
Joined
Nov 19, 2003
Messages
23,031
Location
NY Parks Dept
A colleague recently alerted me to the Half Man Half Biscuit song 'Rock And Roll Is Full Of Bad Wools', which features the lines:

But then, disastrously
They ask him casually
“You come from Leigh-On-Sea,
Do you ever get to Roots Hall?”
Which to him means **** all

(Full lyrics here)

Then, of course there is 'A13 Trunk Road To The Sea' by Billy Bragg, which mentions all the main towns along said road.

(Full lyrics here)

Both of which got me wondering about other songs that mention Southend or the surrounding areas. Are there many others? Over to you SZers...
 
A colleague recently alerted me to the Half Man Half Biscuit song 'Rock And Roll Is Full Of Bad Wools', which features the lines:

But then, disastrously
They ask him casually
“You come from Leigh-On-Sea,
Do you ever get to Roots Hall?”
Which to him means **** all

(Full lyrics here)

Is that based on a real event?
 
Carter USM's Sherif Fatman mentions both Southend and "the master butcher of Leigh-on-Sea" in its lyrics
 
[video=youtube;QO_CT3mcKrM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QO_CT3mcKrM[/video]
 
Madness - Africa
Blackbox Recorder - Goodnight Kiss
Squeeze - It's not Cricket
Kinks - Fortis Green
Kinks - Picture Book
Tom Robinson - 1967 so long ago
Suggs - Oranges and Lemons
 
Tom Robinson - 1967

Fighting with the kids on the fairground
Caravans and TV masts
Generating trucks and Alsatians
I never seen you run so fast
Picking through the litter left afterwards
For .22 shells in the grass
Found a pound note and a keyring
Martin, it's funny them days are past

Saturday flicks at the fleapit
When we had the money to go
Always on the side of the outlaws
And staying for the second show
Bonfires down at the bombsite
And watching the embers glow
Candles and cake in the dugout
Martin, it seems so long ago

1967... it seems so long ago
We were only eleven
It seems so long ago

Day return to Southend Central
Nanny's little treat on the train
Every year we sat on her blanket
And every year it started to rain
Eating apples off the allotments
And swapping cigarette cards
Lending Fat Freddy's train set
And treading on his restaurant car

1967... it seems so long ago
We were only eleven
It seems so long ago

Now I don't wanna give up football
And I don't wanna settle down
Maybe there's life after 25
But I don't feel like sticking around
I don't wanna work in a garage
I don't want my dreams to fold
Never want to have to stop laughing
Martin I'm terrified... of getting old

1967... seems so long ago
1967... it seems so long ago
 
Madness - Africa

Oh, I wake up in the morning, can't get out of bed
What a terrible aching in my head?
I'm pulling up the sheet, shutting out the light
But not today, today I cannot fight

I couldn't get to work if I wanted to
The state I'm in you'd be glad if I don't
I wash my face, comb my hair
Any minute and I will soon be there

I'm standing by the sink, looking over Market Square
The freezing windows, going out I cannot face
The dirty dishes from the night before
And dirty clothes are strewn across the floor

I couldn't get to work if I wanted to
The state I'm in you'd be glad if I don't
I wash my face, comb my hair
Any minute and I will soon be there

'Cause I'll go down to Africa
When I fall asleep
The burning plains of Africa
Is where I'm going to be

Oh, I've said goodbye to Holloway
Farewell Southend-on-Sea
The burning plains of Africa
Is where you will find me

I will soon be there
I will soon be there
'Cause I'll go down to Africa
'Cause I'll go down to Africa
 
Squeeze- It's not cricket

She used to do a topless down at the Surrey Docks
With tassels on her whatsits she did a t'riffic job
Of raising all the eyebrows of every lunchtime mob

She went with all the tossers who kick about a ball
They say their club's the greatest and she has kissed them all
At the Arndale Center, she's up against the wall

I can't name names 'cause that's not cricket
I can't name names that would put me in it
But that's another story in the finish

I saw them at the pictures a tangled heap of love
He had so many women but only classy stuff
I saw him at the clinic, a pink card up his cuff

One holiday in Bognor a stag night hit the town
The groom is in the car park with his trousers down
But that's another story that won't be going round

I can't name names 'cause that's not cricket
I can't name names that would put me in it
But that's another story in the finish

The Deptford had a beano to Southend for the night
With 40 crates of lager, to see the Southend lights
The got home for their breakfast ****ed out of their minds

This girl gave me the minces so I asked her for a dance
And in the death I kissed her and so I took a chance
And when I went to touch her, she tried to break my arm

I can't name names 'cause that's not cricket
I can't name names that would put me in it
But that's another story in the finish
 
The Kinks - Fortis Green

Mum would shout and scream when dad would come home drunk
When she asked him where he'd been, he'd say "Up the Clissold Arms"
Chatting up some hussy, but he didn't mean no harm
Sunday morning drives, just to get away
Ramsgate or Southend, it would always be a lark
Paddling by the sea, trousers rolled up to the knees
Walking by the sea, full of dreams, eating ice cream
Grandma's burnt her cheeks getting brown, turn her over

Fortis Green, memories of days when I was young
It can only be a memory. A time that now has gone

There's Uncle Frank tellin' stories from the war
Frightening all the kids, yet we'd heard it all before
While the bombs were droppin' round, there were parties underground
Aunt Lil's at the gin, while Mum's singing songs
From the 40's when variety, Max Miller was going strong
All the characters are gone, oh, what a bleeding shame
I wish that it could be like it was in the old days
Sat on Auntie's knee, toasting bread in the fire-place

Fortis Green, memories of days when I was young
It can only be a memory. A time that now has gone
Fortis Green, memories when I was just a lad
Collecting bottle tops, threepenny bits. Fishing with my Dad

Sister's in the doorway, snogging with her bloke
Scared to put the cat out 'case I put her off his stroke
But she wouldn't be denied, I got a shilling as a bribe
I used to do my courting on an old kitchen chair
The girls were all so sporting, but I only really cared
for my little Katie-Sue, there was nothing she wouldn't do.
Sunday after tea we would listen to the wireless
Hancock's half-hour, Luxembourg. We'd sit for hours.

Fortis Green, memories of days when I was young
It can only be a memory, a time that now has gone.
Fortis Green, memories when I was a lad.
Collecting bottle tops, threepenny bits. Fishing with my Dad

It can only be a memory. A time that now has gone
Fortis Green, memories when I was a lad.
Collecting bottle tops, threepenny bits. The innocence is gone.
 
Kinks- Picture Book

Picture yourself when you're getting old,
Sat by the fireside a-pondering on[? ].
Picture book, pictures of your mama, taken by your papa a long time ago.
Picture book, of people with each other, to prove they love each other a long ago.
Na, na, na, na, na na.
Na, na, na, na, na na.
Picture book.
Picture book.

A picture of you in your birthday suit,
You sat in the sun on a hot afternoon.
Picture book, your mama and your papa, and fat old uncle charlie out cruising with their friends.
Picture book, a holiday in august, outside a bed and breakfast in sunny southend.
Picture book, when you were just a baby, those days when you were happy, a long time ago.
Na, na, na, na, na na.
Na, na, na, na, na na.
Picture book.
Picture book.
Picture book.
Picture book.

Picture book,
Na, na, na, na na,
Na, na, na, na na,
A-scooby-dooby-doo.
Picture book,
Na, na, na, na na,
Na, na, na, na na,
A-scooby-dooby-doo.

Picture book, pictures of your mama, taken by your papa a long time ago.
Long time ago,
Long time ago,
Long time ago,
Long time ago,
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
 
Yes. I do have colleagues and they do (sometimes) speak to me.

:thumbsup:

Tom Robinson - 1967

Fighting with the kids on the fairground
Caravans and TV masts
Generating trucks and Alsatians
I never seen you run so fast
Picking through the litter left afterwards
For .22 shells in the grass
Found a pound note and a keyring
Martin, it's funny them days are past

Saturday flicks at the fleapit
When we had the money to go
Always on the side of the outlaws
And staying for the second show
Bonfires down at the bombsite
And watching the embers glow
Candles and cake in the dugout
Martin, it seems so long ago

1967... it seems so long ago
We were only eleven
It seems so long ago

Day return to Southend Central
Nanny's little treat on the train
Every year we sat on her blanket
And every year it started to rain
Eating apples off the allotments
And swapping cigarette cards
Lending Fat Freddy's train set
And treading on his restaurant car

1967... it seems so long ago
We were only eleven
It seems so long ago

Now I don't wanna give up football
And I don't wanna settle down
Maybe there's life after 25
But I don't feel like sticking around
I don't wanna work in a garage
I don't want my dreams to fold
Never want to have to stop laughing
Martin I'm terrified... of getting old

1967... seems so long ago
1967... it seems so long ago

Prescient.
 
There is a song on u-bend called "Southend" by Cleo Laine - It only has about 500 views. It's an old song but I think with some of the lyrical geniuses on this site it has chant potential. It will not appeal to all. But I reckon the bit that goes "Southend on Sea" could become "Southend FC".
 
British Sea Power did a song that mentions the Canvey floods quite a bit. Yorkshire Blue being a fan will probably know the title.
 
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