The A to Z of Bilel Mohsni

[Ricky Otto]

I don't know how many people have seen this A to Z of Mario Ballotelli?

http://footballspeak.com/post/2011/10/24/The-A-to-Z-of-Mario-Balotelli.aspx

I thought we could do a Shrimperzone Mohsni one.

Add any wierd and wonderful facts or anocdotes added a couple already after googling him and looking on here.


A
B
C = COMPUTER: Bilel spends a lot of time on his, responding to or liking everything posted on his facebook profile.
D
E
F = FIVE A SIDE: A chap on the preston messageboards told a story of Bilel turning up at a five a side competition, apparently Bil wanted to play but when explained to him that his contract wouldn’t allow it he settled for presenting a trophy.
G
H
I
J
K
L
M
N
O
P
Q
R
S =
T
U = UNDER 12’s: When Bilel was asked on facebook if he’d like to come and watch an under 12’s Sunday league match he decided why not and spent his Sunday morning in a cold wet park watching kids
V
W = WATER : BILELS Favourite Drink
X
Y
Z

 

[Jedi Shrimper]

Too many options for 'R' - Red Mist / Ramadan / Red Cards

E is for English. Or his total lack of it when he joined. Which gave birth to his chant.

 

[ian_the_girth]

I don't know how many people have seen this A to Z of Mario Ballotelli?

http://footballspeak.com/post/2011/10/24/The-A-to-Z-of-Mario-Balotelli.aspx

I thought we could do a Shrimperzone Mohsni one.

Add any wierd and wonderful facts or anocdotes added a couple already after googling him and looking on here.


A
B
C = COMPUTER: Bilel spends a lot of time on his, responding to or liking everything posted on his facebook profile.
D
E
F = FIVE A SIDE: A chap on the preston messageboards told a story of Bilel turning up at a five a side competition, apparently Bil wanted to play but when explained to him that his contract wouldn’t allow it he settled for presenting a trophy.
G
H
I
J
K
L
M
N
O
P
Q
R
S =
T = I saw him taking sweets before paying from the pik n mix, at Basildon cinema. I told him twice to pay first before telling the staff. This was in the summer of 2010.
U = UNDER 12’s: When Bilel was asked on facebook if he’d like to come and watch an under 12’s Sunday league match he decided why not and spent his Sunday morning in a cold wet park watching kids
V
W = WATER : BILELS Favourite Drink
X
Y
Z

I have added to letter "T"

 

[bumpkinblue]

A young lad mentioned to me yesterday that a Southend player comes regularly to his chess club - i know it does'nt fit Bilel's image but the lad (who does'nt follow football) described Bilel to a tee and said how nice and amiable he is with everyone there.

 

[Ricky Otto]

A
B
C = COMPUTER: Bilel spends a lot of time on his, responding to or liking everything posted on his facebook profile.
D
E = English. Or his total lack of it when he joined. Which gave birth to his chant.
F = FIVE A SIDE: A chap on the preston messageboards told a story of Bilel turning up at a five a side competition, apparently Bil wanted to play but when explained to him that his contract wouldn’t allow it he settled for presenting a trophy.
G
H
I
J
K
L
M
N
O
P
Q
R
S =
T= I saw him taking sweets before paying from the pik n mix, at Basildon cinema. I told him twice to pay first before telling the staff. This was in the summer of 2010
U = UNDER 12’s: When Bilel was asked on facebook if he’d like to come and watch an under 12’s Sunday league match he decided why not and spent his Sunday morning in a cold wet park watching kids
V
W = WATER : BILELS Favourite Drink
X
Y
Z

 

[Ricky Otto]

A young lad mentioned to me yesterday that a Southend player comes regularly to his chess club - i know it does'nt fit Bilel's image but the lad (who does'nt follow football) described Bilel to a tee and said how nice and amiable he is with everyone there.

I'd love that to be true ha ha

 

[Pubey]

haha that Chess one would be great!!

 

[Another Surrey Shrimper]

A young lad mentioned to me yesterday that a Southend player comes regularly to his chess club - i know it does'nt fit Bilel's image but the lad (who does'nt follow football) described Bilel to a tee and said how nice and amiable he is with everyone there.

He was taught by RZA and GZA from Wu Tang, I think OBL hangs with them too.

So JJ is suspended for a little scuffle and they turn a blind eye to Bil's pick n mix teefing, a good lawyer could tear this club a new a'hole.

 

[MK Shrimper]

I = Ince. Paul Ince, Bilel's favourite black person. It used to be Eddie Murphy but then Bilel realised that this would kill the joke.
M = Mince. Mmm, Bilel loves a Mince pie which is odd because as a Muslim, he spend Christmas day polishing his collection of 18th Century tea spoons and certainly not giving out presents like Jesus once done.
P = Prince: Bilel's favourite dwarf singer who's often dressed in purple and sings about knobs and ladies front bottoms.
Q = Quince, Bilel's favourite sandwich relish which he buys from a shop just outside of Lille. "Thank god for Eurostar" says Bilel!
V = Vince. No not Van Gogh or Price, but Vaughan. Bilel writes to him weekly to star in Swingers 2, and please god don't let it star Aniston.

 

[Gremlin]

I = Ince. Paul Ince, Bilel's favourite black person. It used to be Eddie Murphy but then Bilel realised that this would kill the joke.
M = Mince. Mmm, Bilel loves a Mince pie which is odd because as a Muslim, he spend Christmas day polishing his collection of 18th Century tea spoons and certainly not giving out presents like Jesus once done.
P = Prince: Bilel's favourite dwarf singer who's often dressed in purple and sings about knobs and ladies front bottoms.
Q = Quince, Bilel's favourite sandwich relish which he buys from a shop just outside of Lille. "Thank god for Eurostar" says Bilel!

Think you've got M wrong. It's Mess: Don't.

 

[Yorkshire Blue]

A: Anywhere. Bilel's gonna play. You need a centre-half, a centre-forward, a right-winger? A keeper?
B: Booked. Bilel's gonna be
D: Drive. Bilel's driving skills reportedly leave a bit to be desired (anyone else remember this story from early last year and Bilel parking his car at training?)
G: Get you. Bilel's gonna.
H: half-way line. Bilel's gonna win the ball on it, play a one-two, take a touch and ping it in the top corner

 

[Jedi Shrimper]

A young lad mentioned to me yesterday that a Southend player comes regularly to his chess club - i know it does'nt fit Bilel's image but the lad (who does'nt follow football) described Bilel to a tee and said how nice and amiable he is with everyone there.

We have to get this in. How about...

K = Kasparov. Bil is an aspiring Kasparov

also how about these...

A = Anger Management.

T = Thriller. For this:

We can move ian_the_girth's ' T"' to P for Pick n' Mix Taker.

 

[Ricky Otto]

http://www.shrimperzone.com/vb/images/icons/icon1.png

A
B = Brady as in Tara Brady our Chief Exec, apparently Bilel kicked his a$$ in a sparring session
C = COMPUTER: Bilel spends a lot of time on his, responding to or liking everything posted on his facebook profile.
D
E = English. Or his total lack of it when he joined. Which gave birth to his chant.
F = FIVE A SIDE: A chap on the preston messageboards told a story of Bilel turning up at a five a side competition, apparently Bil wanted to play but when explained to him that his contract wouldn’t allow it he settled for presenting a trophy.
G
H
I
J
K= Kasparov. Bil is an aspiring Kasparov and apparently attends a chess club weekly
L
M
N
O
P=PIC N MIX Taker I saw him taking sweets before paying from the pik n mix, at Basildon cinema. I told him twice to pay first before telling the staff. This was in the summer of 2010
Q
R
S =
T= Thriller, bilel dressed up as MJ in Thriller for Haloween http://www.shrimperzone.com/vb/attachment.php?attachmentid=1629&d=1322659223&thumb=1
U = UNDER 12’s: When Bilel was asked on facebook if he’d like to come and watch an under 12’s Sunday league match he decided why not and spent his Sunday morning in a cold wet park watching kids
V
W = WATER : BILELS Favourite Drink
X
Y
Z

Added Brady after PS meeting revealed he smashed him at the MMA gym​

 

[dashman]

Z = zany...?

 

[dashman]

H = Hair...?

 

[Davros]

Bil does genuinly love the game

He turned up at our 11 a side tournament before the season to watch his brother play. When i spoke to him, he said he was genuinly itching to play, but his contract would not allow it. Despite his brothers team getting knocked out in the quarters, he hung around for the remainder of the day, and handed the trophy to the winners :thumbsup:

 

[Davros]

A is for Accrington Stanley, the team he scored his first club goal Vs

 

[Davros]

M is for Macclesfield town... the game when Bilel announced himself to the world as a striker with 2 (possibly 3) goals

 

[Cricko]

I don't think it wise to go around calling a player a thief when he might not have known what he was doing, being French etc

Edited accordingly.

 

[Davros]

O is for 'One in Three'... Bilel's current strike rate for the club (goals that is)