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European security warnings

Firestorm

Pedant
Joined
Oct 25, 2003
Messages
15,197
Location
Immersed in the accounts
In view of recent terrorist activities in United Kingdom and elsewhere
there has been an increase in international security levels The English
are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have
raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved."
Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or
even "A Bit Cross."
Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea
supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from
"Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a
"Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its
terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in
France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate."
The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white
flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.
It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of
alert.


Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to
"Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective
Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."
The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance"
to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher
levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."


Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only
threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.


The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy.
These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish
navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy
 
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