Slipperduke's Slippery Column

[Slipperduke]

Is this Slipperduke?

Unfortunately Naps, as you well know, that is exactly what I look like. I went to White Hart Lane a couple of weeks ago and a load of fans thought they were about to sign me. It's always nice to know, that whenever a picture of Man Utd winning the European Cup in 1999 is printed, I'm there on the front row.

 

[Rayleigh Weir]

Unfortunately Naps, as you well know, that is exactly what I look like. I went to White Hart Lane a couple of weeks ago and a load of fans thought they were about to sign me. It's always nice to know, that whenever a picture of Man Utd winning the European Cup in 1999 is printed, I'm there on the front row.

Ross Noble played for Man U and West Brom? I just thought he was famous for rambling on about monkeys in a Geordie accent...

 

[Bentley's Absurd Gait]

That was in tribute to Holocaust Day, I think. His grandfather was killed by the Nazis and his father buried him with his own hands. While the Chelsea players are celebrating today, Avram is flying to Auschwitz to deliver an address.

The more I hear about Avram, the more I respect him.

Sorry to go miles off topic, but respect to Napster and Pubey for mentioning this. It's a massively emotional day for Jewish people, especially in Europe, and when I saw Avram crumple to his knees, the tears I had been choking back over Lampard (I am an emotional basketcase at the moment) came flooding out. My father and I are going to Auschwitz for the second time this summer, we go to pay tribute to family members who died there and to pray for there never being a repeat. It is a nerve jangling experience for Jew and Gentile.

 

[Irish_Shrimper]

Am absolutely delighted for Avram Grant. Was working last night, so waited for the highlights afterwards without hearing the scoreline before - and all i could say was wow.

I absolutely detest Chelsea and Liverpool - but Grant gets way to much stick for my liking, so was hoping Chelsea won. Seeing him fall to his knees was a great moment, i think he finally felt vindicated in his work, and fair play to him he deserves to be travelling to Moscow for the final.

Also i'd like to add that the Essien goal that was ruled out for offside (4 Chelsea players apparently interfering with play) was such a load of bollox...I could not believe it was disallowed. I thought Pepe Reina had a good enough view of the shot - terrible call IMO - but at least it didnt cost them the match.

 

[Pubey]

Sorry to go miles off topic, but respect to Napster and Pubey for mentioning this. It's a massively emotional day for Jewish people, especially in Europe, and when I saw Avram crumple to his knees, the tears I had been choking back over Lampard (I am an emotional basketcase at the moment) came flooding out. My father and I are going to Auschwitz for the second time this summer, we go to pay tribute to family members who died there and to pray for there never being a repeat. It is a nerve jangling experience for Jew and Gentile.

having been to auschwitz myself, huge respect for anyone who can manage to go back for a second time... i can't describe the emotions i felt when i went there, it was a lifechanging experience for me but i don't think i could face going back there

 

[Bentley's Absurd Gait]

having been to auschwitz myself, huge respect for anyone who can manage to go back for a second time... i can't describe the emotions i felt when i went there, it was a lifechanging experience for me but i don't think i could face going back there

I'm not sure if I can mate, would prefer Bognor any day of the week. But we are being joined by my daughter this time, and I need to be with her for this.

 

[Yorkshire Blue]

having been to auschwitz myself, huge respect for anyone who can manage to go back for a second time... i can't describe the emotions i felt when i went there, it was a lifechanging experience for me but i don't think i could face going back there

I might be a bit cold-hearted, but Auschwitz didn't have much of an impact on me. I'd visited the Killing Fields in Cambodia a few years earlier, and that had a far greater impact on me. Maybe that took the edge of it for me. That was a much more raw experience, which made Auschwitz seem almost commercialised in comparison. Tour groups traipsing round Auschwitz, particularly those waving the Israeli flag and wailing, took the edge off it for me. I suppose if I'd lost grandparents or great-grandparents it would have been more personal, as it was I didn't feel anything near their grief.

I found walking round the Killing Fields by myself, with only a handful of others there, a much more depressing place. The atmosphere was no doubt enhanced by the apocalyptic downpour, but also by the way the place had literally been left untouched. I know Auschwitz has largely been left unaltered, but the pits with bits of crushed bone and scraps of fabric still poking out of the mud, the stuka full of skulls were left to speak for themselves in an unadulterated statement of the evil humanity is capable of. In contrast I thought the signs and displays at Auschwitz diluted the message and were too preachy/political, rather than letting the facts speak for themselves and people drawing their own conclusions.

 

[Bentley's Absurd Gait]

I might be a bit cold-hearted, but Auschwitz didn't have much of an impact on me. I'd visited the Killing Fields in Cambodia a few years earlier, and that had a far greater impact on me. Maybe that took the edge of it for me. That was a much more raw experience, which made Auschwitz seem almost commercialised in comparison. Tour groups traipsing round Auschwitz, particularly those waving the Israeli flag and wailing, took the edge off it for me. I suppose if I'd lost grandparents or great-grandparents it would have been more personal, as it was I didn't feel anything near their grief.

I found walking round the Killing Fields by myself, with only a handful of others there, a much more depressing place. The atmosphere was no doubt enhanced by the apocalyptic downpour, but also by the way the place had literally been left untouched. I know Auschwitz has largely been left unaltered, but the pits with bits of crushed bone and scraps of fabric still poking out of the mud, the stuka full of skulls were left to speak for themselves in an unadulterated statement of the evil humanity is capable of. In contrast I thought the signs and displays at Auschwitz diluted the message and were too preachy/political, rather than letting the facts speak for themselves and people drawing their own conclusions.

I agree 100%. The Killing Fields is a shattering experience.

 

[Yorkshire Blue]

Anyway, on a happier note is this one of the funniest things to happen this season.

 

[Uncle Leo]

That will be me then!
Totally overstaged, and confirms what a **** that man truly is.

I think that is very harsh indeed. What is it about him that makes him such a **** in your eyes Rich?

By the way, even forgetting the penalty, I thought he played brilliantly last night.

 

[Aberdeen Shrimper]

I think that is very harsh indeed. What is it about him that makes him such a **** in your eyes Rich?

By the way, even forgetting the penalty, I thought he played brilliantly last night.

He completed 75% of his passes, the most completed passes of any Chelsea player last night and won 50% of his challenges.

Played a blinder IMO

 

[!famous!SUFC!!!!]

sorry lads just clicked onto the page of this thread, in order to read some more of slipperdukes quality articles! and notice a picture of ross noble!! havent read this page so sorry of im interupting but i just cldnt let that picture go.......hes SOOO funny i havnet found anyone who has ever heard of him yet so was bit ironic howa picture of him happened to up here....

 

[Slipperduke]

2007/08 season

For all the moments of high drama, the goals, the saves and the tears, I've got a funny feeling that the 2007/08 season will be remembered as the year that the owners of football clubs across the land finally lost their tenuous grip on reality. It's as if there is a private competition between the power-brokers; who can make the most ridiculous decision of the year? It's going to take an independent tribunal to sift through and find a winner because there's an unprecedented number of candidates. However, we're in luck. I am that independent tribunal and the results are now in.

Phil Gartside, over at Bolton Wanderers, had a chance. After Sam Allardyce's departure, he had a very simple choice. Bring in a like-for-like manager to continue the good work, or attempt to change the entire ethos of the club by appointing a coach who would strive to play proper football. Bolton's current plight is a direct result of Gartside choosing the latter and then panicking and resorting to the former. He gave ex-Liverpool coach Sammy Lee piles of money and encouragment and then sacked him when he didn't see immediate results. As if you could turn around almost a decade of percentage-based, long-ball in ten games.

Allardyce himself didn't fare much better at St James Park. Hired by Freddy Shepherd and fired by Mike Ashley not long afterwards, his was a confusing tenure. If Ashley is as enthusiastic a football fan as he makes out, surely he must have known what kind of football he was going to get from his manager. He should have either paid him off immediately or actually given him time to put foundations down. To sack him halfway through the season once the small amount of money available was spent, gave the impression that he didn't really know what he was doing.

There were others, the Gruesome Twosome at Anfield for alienating one of the best managers on the continent by publicly courting a replacement with no club experience at all. Roman Abramovich for not working harder to resolve his problems with Jose Mourinho. Daniel Levy for effectively sacking Martin Jol after two games where the Dutchman had to play without his first choice defenders. But there was one runaway leader who stood out amonst the rest as we approached the final furlong.

Step forward Dr Thaksin Shinawatra who, with this victory, has proved that it's possible to be a winner and a loser at the same time. Former Manchester City manager Peter Reid launched an attack on Shinawatra this week, begging him not to sack Sven Goran Eriksson.

"It's alright running a country," said Reid, "but sometimes it's harder to run a football club."

I like Reid a lot and he certainly knows what he's talking about. Few people remember now that when he managed City, he finished fifth, one place ahead of Manchester United. However, I think he's wrong here. It's easy to run a football club. Choose a good, proven manager, give him the funds available, support him whole-heartedly and then back off and shut up. Sven has enjoyed success at every club he's managed since emerging from Sweden in the 1980s. Faced with an impossible task of having to build an entirely new team in less than a month, not only did he pull it off, but he did it in style. He's the first City manager in years to do the double over United and he's guaranteed a top ten finish. A sackable offence if ever I saw one.

Apparently the FA have a 'fit and proper persons test' that they use to filter out the undesirables who shouldn't be allowed to run a football club. Might I suggest that they tighten it up a little?

Congratulations Dr Shinawatra! Who said Manchester City wouldn't win anything this year?

 

[Matt the Shrimp]

I might be a bit cold-hearted, but Auschwitz didn't have much of an impact on me.

Blimey... check for that pulse!

That said, from the sounds of your post, they may have updated Auschwitz from when I visited in 1997. It remains the most chilling, brutal, depressing, horror-filling place I have ever been to.

It took me the entirety of the train journey back to Krakow to regain the strength and composure to speak.

BAG, good luck on your second visit. I don't envy you one bit.

Matt

 

[Desert Shrimper]

I agree 100%. The Killing Fields is a shattering experience.

I would concur with the learned gentlemen. I visited The Killing Fields a few years back and it still chills me to my spine to think about it. Pol Pot is a monster beyond all belief.....

It was made all the worse when the namby pamby UK public forgave him and he won "Britain's Got Talent" last year. Just what the hell was that all about???

Cancel my subscription to The Daily Mail immediately.

 

[Slipperduke]

The Championship

After the scenes of celebration that greeted their dramatic play-off victory last May, even the most cynical of Derby County's fans couldn't have imagined the humiliation that was to come. Ironically, if they'd lost that Wembley final, Billy Davies would still be in charge, picking up the plaudits for slowly building a formidable side capable of surviving in the top flight. Instead they went up, and their only contribution to the Premier League has been to raise the interesting argument that perhaps it should be possible to relegate teams early to spare their suffering.

This year, as they slink away from the party like a guest who has vomited in the punch bowl, there is a queue of industrious, but limited challengers waiting to take their place for a season in the firing line. The Championship may be ahead of the Premier League for excitement and unpredictability but in terms of quality, it is light years behind. West Bromwich Albion proved in the FA Cup semi-finals that they alone might be able to put up a decent fight. Those below them, however, are as suited for life in the top flight as fish are for mountaineering.

Stoke City, who booked their ticket with a dour 0-0 against Leicester City, are probably the only football team in the land dull enough to make Bolton Wanderers look like Barcelona. Manager Tony Pulis, aware that his players cannot hope to compete against the good sides on the ground, makes sure they don't have to by pumping the ball through the stratosphere at every opportunity. If you're one of those good-natured supporters who's always happy to see a new face in the division, you're about to get a nasty shock. Unless Stoke undergo a serious change in ideology, they will bore the pants off you without a second thought.

Hull City, who head the chasing pack doomed to fight their way through the play-offs, aren't much better. Led by Phil Brown, Sam Allardyce's former number two, they're another physical unit with a style that only their mother could love. They, like Birmingham before them with Nicklas Bendtner, have built their promotion challenge on the goals of a loanee striker, this time Fraser Campbell from Manchester United. Watford played some awful football the last time they were up and there's no evidence that Aidy Boothroyd has changed his tactics yet. Crystal Palace are led by Neil Warnock, which should say it all and, though Bristol City are noted for trying to keep the ball down, there's something of the Swindon Town about them and we all remember what happened to them.

The most searing indictment on the standard of the Championship is the fact that just 18 points seperated Crystal Palace, at the bottom of the play-offs, from Coventry City on the fringes of relegation. Over 46 games, just six victories would have made the difference between a shot at the Premier League, and the prospect of meeting Yeovil, Walsall and Hartlepool in the third flight. Fans of Championship sides will tell you that it's the most exciting division in Europe, and they're not wrong, I've been there with Southend and it's great fun. Unfortunately, the league doesn't seem to be generating much in the way of quality.

Derby County may be gone, but their hilarious slapstick defending means that they'll never be forgotten. Unfortunately for their replacements, I can't see any chance of the laughter stopping next season.

 

[Yorkshire Blue]

League one > Champion$hite.

Stoke are a poor man's Derby County.

Pompey
Newcastlol*
Notlob
Fulham
Newcastlol again
Man City
Birmingham
Sunderland
Fulham (again)

all take a bow for allowing Derby to take a point off you (or 4 in Newcastle's case).

 

[The General]

Good points Iain!

Palace have looked half entertaining but thats about it!

 

[Irish_Shrimper]

Good stuff Slip. Palace have had a great upturn in fortune under Warnock - and would like to see him get another shot at the Premiership (Even though I am sort of against it, as I despise their chairman!). Agreed about West Brom being the only ones more than capable of holding their own in the top flight, should be a tad easier than last time too with Robson not in charge :D

 

[sufcintheprem]

Whilst the standard in the Championship has been poor, you've also got to bear in mind how few points many Premiership teams are going to be staying up with. It's likely that Wigan will lose to Man Utd and head the bottom third of the Premiership with fewer points than West Ham were relegated with a few years back. As much as I want Fulham to stay up (vindicate appointment of Hodgson, highlight lunacy of Lawrie Sanchez, Bullard/McBride cult status), they shouldn't even have a sniff having not won away from home until April and not done much better at home.

Sadly, I've not watched as much Championship football this year as I'd have liked. Probably Stoke a few times, Coventry, Ipswich, Blackpool and Hull. Sadly, on a match by match basis, none of them stood out as a superior team. To be honest, Blackpool impressed me the most with their attacking ability but clearly weren't all there at the back.

I worry for Stoke a lot but at least Derby's precedent should avoid any groundbreaking embarassment.