ShrimperZone Annual Awards 2009

[Hotman]

I still have absolutely NO idea how you can possibly think that applies to me (even the unedited bits!) :whistling:

you only need 5 to qualify, well done :)

 

[OldBlueLady]

you only need 5 to qualify, well done :)

Only on the edited ones! :p

 

[osymandus]

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders fourth edition, DSM IV-TR, a widely used manual for diagnosing mental disorders, defines narcissistic personality disorder (in Axis II Cluster B) as:[1]

A pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

1. has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
2. is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited green rep, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
3. believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
4. requires excessive admiration and green rep
5. has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations, especially from mods and green rep
6. is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
7. lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
8. is often envious of others or believes others are envious of him or her when red rep is given
9. shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes when red rep is placed upon her

It is also a requirement of DSM-IV that a diagnosis of any specific personality disorder also satisfies a set of general personality disorder criteria.

Blimey who knew the medical council of UK gave such creedence to green rep

I WANT MORE REP !ME AM SPECIAL I AM A GOD KING AND ONLY ABLE TO SPEAK TO OTHER's OF MY KIND (like the inhabitants of shrimperzone oooh wait ....)

On a more serious note i really dont have much of a sense of guilt hmm

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

I often think a lot of my problems & issues relate to Narcissistic Personality Disorder...

 

[BLUEBLOOD]

Ok, i did this without reading any other posts so i may have to go back and do a bit of an edit later :D

Zoner of the Year. DoDtS

Best Signature. Mine (obviously)

Thread of the year. Still love the What Are You Listening To Right Now one

ShrimperZone award for criminal spelling and grammar. Osy

Most deluded Zoner. Plenty too many

Funniest Zoner. Mad Cyril still owns this

Zoner most knowledgeable about football. Beefy talks a good game

Laziest Moderator. Matt the Shrimp is often conspicuous by his absence lately

Best fans to visit the Hall. Leeds

Worst fans to visit the Hall. baaaaaaaaaaa

'Off Topic' Zoner of the year. MK probably

Most likeable Zoner. canveyshrimper

Best overseas Zoner canada John, though i've not seen much of him about lately

Best newcomer. who are the newbies ??

Zoner you would most like to meet in real life. There's a few on my hitlist

Zoner you would least like to meet in real life. No one in particular

 

[Matt the Shrimp]

Zoner of the Year.
Cricko - he is the glue that binds us all together

Best Signature.
Fredheim Holm

Thread of the year.
Mick's Referee reports. One of the few unmissable threads on here.

ShrimperZone award for criminal spelling and grammar.
Another vote for Osy

Most deluded Zoner.
Stanbridge. He thinks he supports a decent club.

Funniest Zoner.
Mad Cyril edges this award yet again, ahead of Nzamba Legend.

Zoner most knowledgeable about football.
EastStandBlue's posts about football in general have been very good. Andy S and Yorkshire Blue are invariably the most insightful posters on here when it comes to SUFC.

Laziest Moderator.
Err, that'll be me. :(

Best fans to visit the Hall.
Orient - for taking defeat in such good spirit... ;)

Worst fans to visit the Hall.
The Ewes, obiously.

'Off Topic' Zoner of the year.
It can only be OBL

Most likeable Zoner.
Ooh, you're all lovely. I'm fortunate and happy to say that my co-owners are particularly lovely.

Best overseas Zoner
chaco27saf - aka Seth, a top fella.

Best newcomer.
Thorpe-Bay-Shrimper and Balmain Shrimper share the award.

Zoner you would most like to meet in real life.
Of the Zoners I haven't met, I'd certainly like a beer and a chin-wag with Rusty.

Zoner you would least like to meet in real life.
Stanbridge. Why would I want to spend time with a Ewes fan?

 

[Thorpe Groyney]

Zoner of the Year.
Bobby Greenberg - owe him far too much green rep.

Best Signature.
Don't really read or look at them.

Thread of the year.
Rusty Shackleford's X-Files

ShrimperZone award for criminal spelling and grammar.
Osymandus (which I suspect should be Aussie Amanda if spelled correctly)

Most deluded Zoner.
MK Shrimper - You'll NEVER convince the Right that Right is wrong.

Funniest Zoner.
Tarquin

Zoner most knowledgeable about football.
Shrimpero

Laziest Moderator.
McNasty - he couldn't be bothered to harangue the MP for Southend East when he stood in front of us at a match. It was left to me to ask about his "travel expenses".

Best fans to visit the Hall.
Borient at full time.

Worst fans to visit the Hall.
Borient before kick-off.

'Off Topic' Zoner of the year.
Mad Cyril

Most likeable Zoner.
Old Blue Lady

Best overseas Zoner
Libertine

Best newcomer.
Silencer

Zoner you would most like to meet in real life.
Flying Scotsman

Zoner you would least like to meet in real life.
Aberdeen Shrimper - I fear his sustained exposure to snow, sheep and granite would make me a temptation too far for him.

 

[Rob Noxious]

"Strange Things Happen"

Zoner you would most like to meet in real life. Can I have a pub gathering of Rusty, MK, Blueblood, Brettie Angell, Nobby Snide and Shrimpero? Thought not.

Actually, we weren't far off this at The Spread last March. Nobby wasn't there and I've never met Blueblood, but it's possibly not as unlikely as you might think! :)

 

[Rob Noxious]

Zoner most knowledgeable about football.
Shrimpero

High praise indeed! :stunned:
Thanks, Groyney - I know that 'mfurok' knows more than me though ... and that 'Man In A Suitcase' knows his stuff too...

 

[BILLERICAY BLUE]

Zoner of the Year.
Cricko

Best Signature.
Disabled, so no idea

Thread of the year.
Mick's Ref Watch threads

ShrimperZone award for criminal spelling and grammar.
Osymandus

Most deluded Zoner.
Grays Blue Jr.

Funniest Zoner.
Mad Cyril. I have to make sure I'm not drinking anything when reading his posts, otherwise it invariably ends up all over the keyboard.

Zoner most knowledgeable about football.
Dead heat between FBM and Southend Neil. Honourable mention to Yb

Laziest Moderator.
None, they all do as much as their time allows

Best fans to visit the Hall.
Leeds

Worst fans to visit the Hall.
Colchester

'Off Topic' Zoner of the year.
OBL

Most likeable Zoner.
MtS

Best overseas Zoner
Libertine

Best newcomer.
All newcomers bring something different, so no-one really stands out

Zoner you would most like to meet in real life.
FBM, because he seems to see games / SUFC in general exactly the same way that I do.

Zoner you would least like to meet in real life.
None - I love you all.

 

[Napster]

Best clique - Battrick!

 

[osymandus]

ShrimperZone award for criminal spelling and grammar.
Osymandus (which I suspect should be Aussie Amanda if spelled correctly)

Why ?? (Amanda ??)

 

[Rob Noxious]

Here's one I done earlier ...

Not quite enough time to contribute 'properly' to this thread as I'm at work, but I did a spoof of the OBL's 'Half-Season Player Review' thread the other night which is nearly relevant to this one...

Beefy -9. The safest pair of hands when it comes to analysis on the zone. His 'matches of the decade' threads have reminded us of how he can turn it on when the occasion demands. Player of the season so far.

Rusty Shackleford - 7. The big man remains able to put any left-winger on his jacksie when he employs the full force of his armoury. Appears to have been distracted at times this season by world events.

Dave the Shrimper - 7. As rumbustious as ever, this no-nonsense zoner remains staunch for the cause and has never been known to shirk a challenge. Off-zone activities have not dimmed his desire to put in a decent shift. A zoner's zoner.

The Big Shrimp - 6.5. Not a lot of zoners like playing against him for obvious reasons. Remains combative but fair in his challenges. Needs to kick on in the second half of the season to really win over his critics.

Canvey Shrimper - 8. Remains a fans' favourite and always has a cheeky quip up his sleeve when the going gets tough. Could play at a higher level if he chose to.

Grays Blue Junior - 6. Steely adventurer who likes to get up his opponents' noses, he is very much the Lee Bowyer of the zone. Now seems to be comfortable with his team-mates and though he doesn't like to show it, we get the best out of him when he feels loved by fellow zoners. One to watch and definitely the most improved zoner of the season so far.

OBL - 7. I love her spirit and we will miss her if she goes. Still prone to unnecessary skirmishing.

Blueblood - 6.5. A midfield terrier if ever there was one! Need to see more of the cut and thrust we associate with his game.

Firestorm - 8. Quality. An under-rated gem IMHO. Drifts in and out of the zone, but when he drifts in provides incisive and thoughtful contributions.

Wiggy - 5. Disappointing season from the Wiggster thus far. Has the ability to entertain and infuriate in equal measure and seems to have been absent somewhat lately. Remains the best cross-dresser on the zone though.

East Stand Blue - 7.5. Can plough his own furrow on occasions, but you cannot fault his preparation and attention to detail. Definitely has the potential to have a long career on the zone. It's all up to him really.

Yogi Up The Cagire - 7. The veteran Pyreneean still weighs in with some telling contributions, particularly in the Match Thread. Very much a team player and younger zoners could learn a lot from his performances. Needs to pace himself over what could still be a long season.

Lord Football - 7. Still has capacity to upset the right side of the zone with one of his well-aimed thunderbolts from the left. He has tended to concentrate on match reports this season but this cultured leftie shows that you can still combine football and politics with aplomb.

Irate Ian - haven't seen him this season, so can't comment.

MK Shrimper - 7. Enduring and indie. A zoner for life, not just half a season.

Cricko - 8. How he keeps this band of zoners all playing well together is beyond me! And he's still only 28 ...

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

Zoner of the Year: Can't split YB, Naps and Carruthers.

Best Signature: Greenberg's 'The Left Backs' (designed by Drastic Sturgeon I believe).

Thread of the year: Cover Letter - genius

ShrimperZone award for criminal spelling and grammar: Forever a Shrimper. Such a shame from such a gifted student.

Most deluded Zoner: ACU - thinks that Ron walks on water

Funniest Zoner: Greenberg. When he hits, he destroys.

Zoner most knowledgeable about football: YB and FBM

Laziest Moderator:

Best fans to visit the Hall: They're all scum

Worst fans to visit the Hall: Dead heat. All scum.

'Off Topic' Zoner of the year: Cyril knows how to introduce 80s casual fashions into any topic.

Most likeable Zoner: Swiss

Best overseas Zoner: Smudger if he's overseas. Berrichone if he's not.

Best newcomer: Dick Bate's Protege

Zoner you would most like to meet in real life: Carruthers, Swiss, GBJ

Zoner you would least like to meet in real life: All of the youths who would be discussing signatures and prank calls in txtspk.

 

[Jedi Shrimper]

Zoner of the Year. Pubey / Bobby Greenberg
Best Signature. Rusty's "Rusty: Live in Concert"
Thread of the year. Any of the 'Battles'.
Funniest Zoner. Tarquin Fauntleroy
Zoner most knowledgeable about football. Yorkshire Blue
'Off Topic' Zoner of the year. Tarquin Fauntleroy
Most likeable Zoner. Libertine / MK Shrimper
Best overseas Zoner Libertine
Zoner you would most like to meet in real life Pubey / Slipperduke

 

[Yorkshire Blue]

Dave the Shrimper - 7. As rumbustious as ever, this no-nonsense zoner remains staunch for the cause and has never been known to shirk a challenge. Off-zone activities have not dimmed his desire to put in a decent shift. A zoner's zoner.

Shrimpero, you should have seen him in his prime. DtS is the anti-McCormack as his quality has decreased the less time he's spent in the pub.

The threads he use to start before he got all loved up were truly legendary. Now he is all settled down and happy he is a shadow of his former self. Artists need to suffer for their art and in DtS it is the art, not the man, that is suffering.

Where are those odes to Scott Forbes and those Friday polls of old?

Since he was brought under the thumb we are more likely to get a thread asking what colour cardigan he should wear, or a poll on dinner party etiquette.

 

[BLUEBLOOD]

Actually, we weren't far off this at The Spread last March. Nobby wasn't there and I've never met Blueblood, but it's possibly not as unlikely as you might think! :)

Just ask Dick .. he knows me only too well !!!! :stunned:

 

[BLUEBLOOD]

Best clique - Battrick!

WRONG !!!

The correct answer of course is the Prediction League one :p

 

[OldBlueLady]

WRONG !!!

The correct answer of course is the Prediction League one :p

Not the PHB one? Or are we a sub clique of the other? :unsure:

 

[BLUEBLOOD]

Not the PHB one? Or are we a sub clique of the other? :unsure:

Gotta be a sub-clique

without me you'd never exist ;) :whistling: