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Slipperduke

The Camden Cad
Joined
Aug 24, 2004
Messages
4,333
Location
North London
Don't panic on the first line, you haven't got the day wrong. This is for tomorrow's paper!


Six months ago, who could have believed that Chelsea would see tonight’s trip to Southend as anything other than a formality? For just a brief period at the start of his reign, Luiz Felipe Scolari appeared to have created the side that Roman Abramovich had always wanted. A team packed with flair and pace that dared to attack and keep attacking until the final whistle blew. Rival supporters and neutrals will no doubt rejoice at the dramatic decline of the London side, but there is something a little sad about the missed opportunity to create something special at Stamford Bridge. Watching Chelsea grind out results was painful, but who would have begrudged them their glory if it had been achieved with the verve of those early days?

Perhaps Jose Mourinho understood Chelsea’s predicament better than anyone. He understood that every opponent would raise their game against them and he knew that the concept of the team was more important than the pride of individuals. There would have been no pre-match row with Nicolas Anelka, as alleged in one UK tabloid yesterday, because there would have been no Anelka. If he’d have had his way, there would have been no black moods from Michael Ballack because he wouldn’t be there either. Mourinho’s clear ideology and leadership was the principle reason for Chelsea’s success.

But that success wasn’t enough for the hierarchy at Stamford Bridge. They wanted marketable superstars, t-shirt sales and increased Asian revenue streams and, with the greatest of respect, you just don‘t get that from Ricardo Carvalho. They forced Ballack and Andreiy Shevchenko into the squad on enormous wages. They undermined Mourinho with a Director of Football and then forced him out altogether. His departure left a power vacuum that was eagerly filled by self-important, conflicting factions from across the club. Now Chelsea reap the whirlwind.

Scolari has inherited a squad of powerful personalities, many of them belonging to ageing bodies and he’s not allowed to replace any of them. I’ve watched him shrug his way through numerous press conferences as he is pushed on potential signings. His answer is always to, “ask Peter Kenyon.” He is head coach of a club with a hopeless youth system, with a scouting team that has been stripped bare and an owner who has severed the umbilical cord of cash. Lifting and buoying the players is his only hope, but confidence is rock bottom and there are murmurs of discontent from all corners of the club. I’m told that the first team squad have just had their matchday ticket allocation halved so that the club can fit more high-paying corporate bottoms into the stadium and they’re not amused.

I didn’t believe that Chelsea were in trouble until I saw their capitulation at Old Trafford. The inertia that carried them through the second half of last season is gone and, without clear leadership, the club is fraying at the edges. The gulf in class between their squad and Southend United is still so vast that they should win tonight’s clash comfortably, but if there is another surprise, if Peter Clarke can muster up another exploitation of Chelsea’s defensive shortcomings, the shockwaves will be seismic. The only weapon that Southend have at their disposal is their unflinching bravery, but if Chelsea can’t match them in that department then their technical superiority will mean nothing. This could be an interesting night.
 
I assume you will be gracing Roots Hall with your eloquence and your presence tomorrow night, to provide a totally unbiased view for your readers in the Far East?
 
I assume you will be gracing Roots Hall with your eloquence and your presence tomorrow night, to provide a totally unbiased view for your readers in the Far East?

I'll be there with bells on, sat in the pressbox correcting all the national hacks on the identity of the Southend players! Naturally, I'll be utterly objective in my analysis...ahem...

PS - Singapore have gone so crazy for this game, that I'll actually be filing two match reports. One for the evening edition, which goes to press just before midnight, and another in-depth account for Friday. That city isn't going to know what's hit it.
 
I'll be there with bells on, sat in the pressbox correcting all the national hacks on the identity of the Southend players! Naturally, I'll be utterly objective in my analysis...ahem...

PS - Singapore have gone so crazy for this game, that I'll actually be filing two match reports. One for the evening edition, which goes to press just before midnight, and another in-depth account for Friday. That city isn't going to know what's hit it.


I hope you thoroughly enjoy yourself! Where ARE all the Press going to sit though? It's going to be a mighty squeeze!
 
I hope you thoroughly enjoy yourself! Where ARE all the Press going to sit though? It's going to be a mighty squeeze!

I think I've got Alan Green and Brian Woolnough on my lap, though at least they'll keep me warm. Especially Brian with his big old hair.
 
Is Wooly going - I think he's a good writer. Do you know who's going from each outlet? Paul Hayward? Steve Howard?

It should be all the big names because there's not much else on that night. Samuel, Winter, Lipton, Custis, McCarra, Barclay and Wallace are probably there, but the more established old order are a little less likely. They tend to venture out for the Blue Ribband events only, though you never know. There's blood in the water, so it'll attract a lot of sharks.
 
I thought Custis was strictly Northern only? Good line up there nonetheless.

Can't be sure that they'll all be there, but that tends to be the front row for the big games in the South-East. Shaun Custis does a lot of Tooncastle, but always seems to be at Emirates or Stamford Bridge as well. Must be a hell of an expense account.
 
Slip / anyone

Who is Paul Hayward writing for now? I see he left The Daily Mail a couple of weeks ago. Always writes a good column.
 
Another nice read and I can't wait for the game, cheers Slips.

I do have a question though. Your writing seems far superior to much I read at the BBC, would you ever consider taking a job with them?

Obviously, I don't understand how big/small your Singapore job is, and whether the BBC would be a step down/up..
 
. The inertia that carried them through the second half of last season is gone

Blimey, you've even got me believing we might get something from tomorrow night, Sir Slipper, and I am the world's worst pessimist about us live on telly.

Just one quibble, shouldn't "inertia" be "momentum"?

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