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  1. Slipperduke

    Wembley's Awful Pitch

    90,000 seats, 2618 toilets, 26 lifts, 98 kitchens and 34 bars. Was it too much to ask for Wembley to provide just one decent playing surface? Saturday’s FA Cup semi-final was like watching naughty ten year olds playing football indoors on an untacked carpet. Every change of direction brought a...
  2. Smudger

    Breaking News Players Fully Paid Up By Martin Dawn

    Just heard from a very good source that the players have now been paid by Martin Dawn. Feel free to check with any players you currently stalk on Facebook.... ;) A bit of good news at last.....
  3. Benfleet A1

    Kids Just Don't Know Their Born

    While having a wonder around the shop today it suddenly struck me just how little kids know of the real world and what they are missing out on. It started when my missus mentioned our niece and how it must cost her mum a fortune so she can wear all the clobber and make-up yet she hasn't two...
  4. What has Ron Martin ever built?

    This is a genuine question; not necessarily a pop at Ron. I was just wondering what Ron has ever built as I am yet to see his name or Martin Dawn linked to any development I have ever come across. Everyone seems to defend Ron by calling him a "property developer", so what does his portfolio look...
  5. canveyshrimper

    The Chilcot Inquiry

    I have never seen so many Old Bill in one place at one time until this morning. I was about to nip into Pret for my morning coffee, when about 15 meat wagons came past, swiftly followed by about 30 coppers on foot. Plus there was the incessant sound of helicopters in the sky. In my hazy pre dawn...
  6. TrueBlue

    Arise Southend

    Come on people lets try and be a bit positive about things allot of people on here myself included have been down in the dumps about the current state of the club and the team but what I do know is that I am sure Tilly is doing all he can along with the rest of the back room staff to steady the...
  7. Pay Up Pompey, Pompey Pay up

    It never rains, it pours... Except in Portsmouth, where the football club seems to permanently be in the grips of a category 5 hurricane. The south coast club are gripped in a relegation battle they seem destined to lose and the mystery surrounding their owner seems to deepen by the day. The...
  8. Benfleet A1

    Working For a ***** Company

    As some of you will know, I work for a Rescue & Recovery Company which is not your average 9-5 sort of job. Most though not all who do this job expect long hours, all weather conditions and sometimes, the very real risk of serious injury or even death. It's the nature of the job (considered in...
  9. Slipperduke

    Tweet That, Darren

    Have you ever Twittered? I have to confess that, like European federalism, gardening and 'Jedward', I always thought it was something for other people to worry about. Twitter, I found out this week, is a chance to spurt 140 characters of whatever you're doing at the world, or at least those...
  10. number11

    Club Ownership

    Sorry if this has been gone over in the other threads, but for an idiot such as myself, can someone clarify who 'owns' the club. Is it the case that Martin Dawn plc own a majority of shares in Southend United and Ron Martin owns a majority of shares of Martin Dawn (and therefore effectively...
  11. Slipperduke

    Who Should Replace Rafa?

    It's 6pm on Sunday evening in Merseyside. The last supporter trudges out of the Anfield turnstiles, his head hung low. Red scarves are left strewn amongst the litter in the aisles of the Kop. Somewhere outside you can hear the gleeful chorus of 'Glory, Glory Man United'. Liverpool have been...
  12. seany t

    Help me remember a 90's British porn star!

    Come on folks, I know you can do it. She had blonde hair. She wasn't Jo Guest. Or Lindsey Dawn-MacKenzie. She edited 'Parade' magazine for a bit we reckon. She definitely wasn't shy. My mate at work thinks she had a double-barreled name, and may have been called Vicky. I'm not so convinced...
  13. Aberdeen Shrimper

    Bazilian Grand Prix

    Anyone watching? Handbags at dawn!!!!
  14. Yorkshire Blue

    The second greatest single moment in your Blues lifetime?

    Obviously the first has to be Brett Angell's goal to beat the scum 1-0, but what is the second greatest? I think mine would have to be beating Gillingham 1-0 in the league cup with the best crafted goal I've ever seen. I think it was Adrian Clarke who swung in a carefully measured corner...
  15. Aberdeen Shrimper

    Question Relive the best week of your life again

    If you had the opportunity to relive a week from your past what week would it be and why. When asked, I considered many options including the week my son was born, the week I got married, various Southend United experiences from Benji at Bury to Man U and Chelsea. But for some reason I...
  16. DTS

    Best bit of strumpet in Eastenders.

    Mrs DtS subjects me to watching Eastenders all the time. I used to hate it but over the years I think she has worn me down to the point where I actually think its ok now. On the plus side you do get a few ok looking women in there. But my question to the floor is who is the best? Personally...
  17. BoyWonder2

    Do you mates "disappear" when loved up?

    This is something that proper dawned on me on Saturday night. I was invited to Sky Bar in Bas Vegas, for beers and stupid dancing by two girls who I hadn't seen in 3 months, partly because one of them is loved up. I originally didn't want to go with just two girls as I didn't have a wingman...
  18. yogi bear up the cagire

    The age of realism

    Has a new age dawned on SZ?............an age of reason and realism. Imagine if it was this time last year people would be shouting on the board......and even in the streets........what the hell's going on!.....mid June and we've signed no one.............Huddersfield have signed this...
  19. sufc_tom

    How to wash the toilet.

    HOW TO WASH THE TOILET This was simply too much of a time saver, not to share it with you. 1. Put the lid and the seat of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl. 2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom. 3. In one...
  20. Slipperduke

    Don't Panic, Arsene

    As dawn broke on the morning after the worst night of his career, I wonder what Arsene Wenger was doing. For some reason, I imagine him stood at the back door of his house, watching the sun rise slowly over his dew-drenched garden, sipping coffee and shaking his head pensively, wondering what...