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tools

  1. Mediocre start?

    Tilly with the smallest squad in world football continues to work his magic,The lads are playing ok enough and deserve more than 8 pts but there lies the problem,Averaging around 1pt per game we are already playing catch up. I believe 75pts will clinch the final play off position,If true the...
  2. Tangled up in Blue

    A typical bloke...discuss?

    A typical bloke, having split from his latest girlfriend,decided to take a holiday.He booked himself on a cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is; until the ship sank. He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing; only bananas and coconuts. After...
  3. Interpol Shrimper

    Dead laptop

    Can any of the IT experts on here offer me an opinion on what to do with my dead laptop please? Typically, I've been saying for weeks I MUST backup the photos/music etc onto a separate storage drive & I was going to do it yesterday (honestly!!!) but at about 6ish on Saturday night my Dell...
  4. Mad Cyril

    Best power tools

    I might be extending my arsenal soon and want to know what those ITK think. Obviously I haven't included any toy manufacturers in this list.
  5. Magnum PI

    Ex-Shrimpers League Goalscorers Table: # Week 30

    Here is the latest fortnightly roundup from the Ex-Shrimpers. Glad to see I am still of some use as my scouts found a few missed by others. Work is crazy at the moment so struggling to get them on the web. 17 March Hal Robson-Kanu scored of course against Southend in the big 3-0 win On the...
  6. Slipperduke

    Scolari's Not To Blame

    Luis Felipe Scolari may have paid the price for Chelsea's bleak midwinter, but who was really to blame for the club's decline in form? The Brazilian boss may have made mistakes in his short reign at Stamford Bridge, but he was never given the tools he needed to rebuild an ageing squad. It was...
  7. Zane Lowe Masterpieces - Rage Against The Machine

    Yes I know, Zane Lowe is a complete tw*t (could he be a late entrant for Battle of the Tools?!). However last night he played in full, Rage Against The Machines self-title album, as part of his Masterpieces series. I didn't listen to it last night, but have just blasted the album out in...
  8. Aberdeen Shrimper

    What has happened to Battle of the Tools??

    Any one got a clue???
  9. Irish_Shrimper

    Interview with an Exile: Part 5 - SpanishShrimper

    This week, Nick (SpanishShrimper), from Spain answers the questions. I haven't had the time to check his answers, so hope there is nothing too embarrassing etc. that shouldn't be here.... :unsure: 1) How long have you been an exile? A) Well technically, since I left the Southend area...
  10. Help Please! Something wrong with my computer

    Downloaded a torrent file afew days ago and my computer just restarted itself. when it came back on, a pop up keeps coming up in my toolbar saying "Your computer is infected! Windows has detected spyware infection! It is recomended to use special antispyware tools to pervent data loss.Windows...
  11. Stats

    Battle Of The Tools - Prelim 10

    Sorry for the delay people, lead up to xmas rather busy and trying to sort out a job as well. Anyway without further delay we have the last Prelim match today between checkout king Dale Winton (Canvey Shrimper) and Ginger Spice Geri Halliwell (Desert Shrimper). Has Winton's checkout beeped too...
  12. Mad Cyril

    Best / Most wanted Power Tools.

    I was reading the Screwfix catalogue last night looking for Xmas presents and found myself wishing I had more power tools. The best power tool I own is a De Walt cordless drill which I simply could not do without. I often find myself nodding towards builder types with De Walt cases and massive...
  13. Rusty Shackleford

    Peter Taylor on Talksport

    Anyone listening at the moment? That question to Spud from 'Karl the Shrimper' was from me. And fair play to Jeremy Kyle for posing the question, and fair play to Spud for answering it so honestly. If you didn't listen, I asked why he felt his time with the Blues was such a failure. In...
  14. South Bank Hank

    A ShrimperZone A-Z Compendium of Totterific Totty

    I had intended to kick off the 2008 Totty Cup today, precisely 1 year after the inaugural competition. Since we already have the excellent Battle of the Tools in full flow (with other battles lining up) so the TC will have to wait it's turn which is only fair and correct. In preparation for...
  15. Stats

    Battle of the tools - Prelim 9

    Second matchup of the day pits ex Southend boss Barry Fry (Irish Shrimper) against leader of the free world GW Bush (Jassy FA) . Has Fat Barry leaving the club and taking many good players from a premiership chasing team cheesed you off or has GW Bush's attempts to mess up the world got your...
  16. Stats

    Battle Of The Tools - Prelim 8

    Todays first matchup pits Ex Southend striker Leon Clarke (Steveo) against moonwalking sensation Michael Jackson (Stevie GGG) . So did Leon's lazy attitude whilst playing for the Shrimpers anger you or has Wacko Jacko done been to bad for your liking? The choice is yours.
  17. Stats

    Battle Of The Tools - Prelim 7

    Tonights match pits TV personality Vanessa Feltz (Aberdeen Shrimper) vs Newcastle DOF Dennis Wise (Old Blue Lady). So has fatty feltz wound you up too many times or has the 4ft dwarf nibbled at too many ankles for your liking. The choice is yours.
  18. Hotman

    too late for battle of the tools...

    But Justin Fletcher from CBeebies is the biggest **** going he over exagerrates everything - and what makes it worse is that he is an MBE for ****s sake. all he does is prick around on tv like a ****. Imagine my horror, when googling to find out about him I came across this...
  19. Stats

    Battle Of The Tools - Prelim 6

    Second of todays battles pitches soul singer Amy Winehouse (Carl) against tv's healthy eating expert Gillian McKeith (Pubey). So is Amy frustraiting you throwing away her talent making wrong decision after wrong decision in her life or should McKeith be told where to go and I'll eat the hell...
  20. Stats

    Battle Of The Tools - Prelim 5

    Today pits chat show guru Robert Kilroy-Silk (Overseas Shrimper) against Premier League high flying footballer Ashley Cole (Statski77) . So does Kilroy come out with too much stuff you think is way below the line or does cash grabbing, referee bashing, chocolate stabbing, general r'se CAshley...
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