• Welcome to the ShrimperZone forums.
    You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which only gives you limited access.

    Existing Users:.
    Please log-in using your existing username and password. If you have any problems, please see below.

    New Users:
    Join our free community now and gain access to post topics, communicate privately with other members, respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and free. Click here to join.

    Fans from other clubs
    We welcome and appreciate supporters from other clubs who wish to engage in sensible discussion. Please feel free to join as above but understand that this is a moderated site and those who cannot play nicely will be quickly removed.

    Assistance Required
    For help with the registration process or accessing your account, please send a note using the Contact us link in the footer, please include your account name. We can then provide you with a new password and verification to get you on the site.

crack

  1. cockles is back

    does anyone want to see something?

  2. Kent Shrimper

    Something to cheer you up

    Following on from Daves great pictorial effort of the Alison Moyet song Blue i decided to have a crack showing promotions at Stockport, Bury, Mil Stad, Swansea, Brizzie Rovers and Freddys strike against the mancs I feel as **** as everyone today but hopefully this will take the edge of...

  3. The view from Neverland on Maldon!

    My mate and me (not captain hook or tinkerbell) turn up on what turns out to be a pretty 'fresh' evening in Maldon. My Mccoys not being enough, I decide to hit the burger bar. A little family run establishment, £1 for about 8 chips being my biggest agitation. 45 minutes until kick off, I have a...
    • Peter Pan
    • Thread
    • amounts ban burger crack cries didn dink dru eager establishment grab hadn hills literally mccoys pulled rate rubbish tangled toilets wasn wouldn
    • Replies: 12
    • Forum: Shrimpers Chit-Chat
  4. ldnfatso

    Risqué Riddles

    Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again. Q. What's a mixed feeling? A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car. Q. What's the height of conceit? A. Having an orgasm and calling out...
    • ldnfatso
    • Thread
    • boyfriend cliff crack kee pain paint swallow
    • Replies: 1
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  5. DTS

    If you were offered the chance...

    To chop in all our strikers bar Freddy and Ademeno as he has not had a crack of the whip yet for the sum total of say £200k would you. This would mean someone coming in to sign the following - Bradbury, Harrold, Foran, Hooper and Payner. On the downside this would represent a fairly big loss...
  6. Murkey_Mouse

    Sheffield Utd court fight .....

    I really hope the Sheffield Utd chairman get his wish, if Sheffield Utd stay in the Premiership as extra 21st club, its mean there is space in Championship so 3rd from bottom in Championship will get a 2nd crack at playing this level - Iam just cluching straws right now, but this might give us...

  7. Work today

    For one reason or another I've done fug-all today. My question is, is Shrimperzone as addictive as crack cocaine or am I just a lazy, work-shy get?
  8. Jam_Man

    What was here before the big bang ?

    Just a quick question. The universe was created by a big bang right ? Before that nothing existed. I dont get it, everything must be inside something else, if the universe suddenly appeared from nowhere what did it appear inside ? If there was nothing there how did it appear ? There must...
  9. Bluesmanager

    Just About The Most Ridiculous Thing Ever

    Just had a ODI on Brian Lara 2005 - Slog Mode 50 overs with fielding restrictions. My scorecard reads thus: J Hobbs C Gilchrist B Aktar 6 (5 balls) S Gavaskar C Kallis B McGrath 20 (8) D Bardenham C Kallis B Mulitheran 392 (83) G Pollock C Gilchrist B McGrath 12 (3) G Sobers RUN OUT (Kallis) 37...
  10. Che's Left Foot

    Ron: The day my family home was raided by the police

    Apologies if it's already been posted, but Ron's article on the echo website makes for interesting reading... Link: http://www.echo-news.co.uk/display.var.1263579.0.the_day_my_family_home_was_raided_by_the_police.php
    • Che's Left Foot
    • Thread
    • bra centred chocolate consultants contractors conversation crack daw deed degree didn dining dressed driveway following foo fro intent mix money occasions officer officers posted prepared promoting recognise reserved resources shrinking sinister sons supply test town unusually warrant weapons wished
    • Replies: 22
    • Forum: Shrimpers Chit-Chat
  11. DTS

    If your loved one was lost at sea..........

    If your loved one was lost at sea -How long would you wait until you started dating again. Baring in mind they could be gone for ever and the coast guard didnt hold out much hope how long before you started trying to crack onto her mates? :guns:
    • DTS
    • Thread
    • crack didn didnt
    • Replies: 9
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  12. DTS

    Worst injury sustained while wathcing Southend.

    Come on lads....Sure we have all either drunk too much or over celebrated a goal like it was the world cup finals and done yourself an injury. I think my worst one personally was after Rushen away a few years ago. I had been drinking like every other Southend fan in a pub called British Arms. I...

  13. A message for the lads ahead of saturday

    ...For God's sake shoot. Robinson really isn't that great a keeper and most of our recent goals have been from distance. Every time we're within 25 yards of goal, have a crack and we might have a chance.
  14. Slipperduke

    The view from Tufnell Park...

    My neighbours will never speak to me again. When I awoke on Wednesday morning to find my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth and an empty bottle of white wine in my bed, I was dimly aware that something incredible might have happened. It took another 30 seconds for the memories to filter back...
    • Slipperduke
    • Thread
    • ageing anfield booze chairs ched chickens chocolate confusing continued crack crowded cup didn eastwood edged entered fingers freddy eastwood fur gaming hall hanks headed icke incredible intact league legion ley liverpool neighbours noses pace pain phones provoked pulling religious roots screaming shortest shouts slick snatch spencer prior spread suppor token two minutes voice wasn
    • Replies: 23
    • Forum: Shrimpers Chit-Chat

  15. Still not sunk in yet!

    Words can't describe how I felt last night, a better feeling than the col u game in the LDV, but if our boys can do that to Man U, why can't they beat the likes of Hull and alike. Come on boys we now know you can do it as a team, lets crack on now...
  16. Jonny_Stokes

    A bit of perspective

    Firstly: f%&k off Jonny, Orient scum, going down, East London is full of ethnic minorities. Right, now we've got that out of the way: I can't believe the negativity on this board. I really can't. I know football fans are fickle creatures, and I know as well as any of you how it feels to embark...
    • Jonny_Stokes
    • Thread
    • amazed atmospheres attitudes capital crack cup ethnic exactly fa cup foo incredible ish ley lose mis mistakes proposed qui scum upside wes
    • Replies: 37
    • Forum: Shrimpers Chit-Chat
  17. Matt the Shrimp

    Interview with Adrian Clarke

    Following my abortive attempts to set up an interview with Efe Sodje (although I'll have another crack shortly), I thought I would delegate the task of conducting the next SZ interview to someone who is far funnier and better at writing than I am - namely the Zone's very own slipperduke. For...
  18. Southendsleeper

    See you next Wednesday - A match report

    Well, what can I say. Some of the worst officials I've seen at the hall, the ref was a disgrace, missing most things, yet giving trivial thing. Hard but fair tackles were penalised, Freddy, fouled but with the ball at his feet in front of goal is stopped to take the ball back for a freekick...
    • Southendsleeper
    • Thread
    • amazed amusement checks crack didn didnt ead fro hall loud marking occasions ops pace pulled res shirt stopped
    • Replies: 13
    • Forum: Shrimpers Chit-Chat
  19. DTS

    Players you cant believe we got money for.

    I have got to start with Jason Lee..... Signed as a replacement for Stan Collymore but I dont think he was even fit to grace the pitch. One of the single worst players I have ever seen. A sparkling debut in a 4-1 demolition job at Millwall gave us false hope. I can only assume that Frank Clark...

  20. weres everyone drinking at leicester

    me and 10 others are going buy mini bus 4 my 30th birthday and we are stopping of at the hobby horse pub been told its a good crack
Back
Top