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  1. Hi everyone

    New member here. Moved to Essex for a spell from 1989 through 1998-ish and started following Southend United as my "local team" shortly thereafter. Went pretty regularly through the promotion seasons, driving to away games in a C-Reg Rover 216 with Jamie from Grays and Stuart "the postman"...
  2. Uncle Leo

    Best fictional postman

    No jokes about The General please... Early nominations are Postman Pat Postman Plod (The Miserable Sod) Cliff Clavin Newman
  3. OldBlueLady

    Tipping and "Christmas Boxes" - do you, and if so, who to?

    Just following on from the discussions on the free travel thread, I thought I would open it up more for discussion. Back in the day it used to be common place to give your postman, your milkman, your window cleaner and your dustman a Christmas "box" or a "good drink", in a similar way in which...
  4. Which postman will you get ?

    Just seen on the OS that five fans will be selected to have their pre-ordered shirts delivered by one of the players. Got me thinking , and I imagine that Conor Clifford will be 'slightly late' and then will knock 'just above the letterbox' using 'two hands'. Any ideas for other delivery...
  5. Positive Customer Relations

    Amongst a number of other people I had my season card ticket taken away by the stewards after it ws not accepted for the game on Tuesday night. They still let me in, but other than saying that the club would be in contact they could not say what the problem was. So I popped into the booking...
  6. TrueBlue

    Dont blame Martin for tonight

    For once some of you need to wake up and see that tonight OUR MANAGER HAS GOT IT WRONG not Martin not the ****ing postman Tilson yes Southend legend in his own right but seriously tonight was down to poor management nothing more some of you are to far up Tilsons arse and use Ron Martin as...
  7. Postmen and women

    Just watching the Panorama programme and is strikes me that I honestly cannot fault the excellent job postmen/women do. I have never had anything go missing and I buy a load of stuff online. I know there are at least one or two posties here on Shrimperzone. Cheers for a great service lads -...
  8. Napster

    Andy Rammell

    Postman in Bewdley
  9. Your Jokes, Strictly for the Pub only.

    A Boy walks into his parents bedroom and see's his dad having sex with his mum. ''What are you doing ?'' ''Making you a brother or sister!'' His dad replies. ''Do her doggy style, I want a puppy.'' Joe is on his last day at work as a postman. He receives many thank-you cards and monetary...
  10. The General

    1 in 15 jobs to go at Royal Mail

    Starting from Monday, apparently. For every 15 delivery walks - the RM want 1 walk to be done on top on the postman's normal delivery. Hey i cant grumble - as i've had it easy for the past 5 years - and its not going to add a whole lot of time but expect local strikes - maybe at the bigger...
  11. Shrimper


    http://www.fmylife.com/ I have my own. I just opened the door to the Postman in the nude. He laughed. FML.
  12. Ron Manager

    Friday Joke

    A postman who has been doing the same round his whole working life goes into work on his last day before retiring. On his rounds he delivers to a house where the same people have lived for 20-odd years. As he walks up the path the lady of the house comes out and asks him to come in for a moment...
  13. Mad Cyril

    London Zoo

    I spent the weekend around Little Venice and thought it might be an idea to take the kids to London Zoo. I can honestly say I have never seen such a lazy bunch of animals in my life (apart from some of the monkeys and the otters) and the penguin enclosure looked like a low budget Wickes water...
  14. DTS

    SZ Careers Advice Centre.

    Right, Last few months has been a really hard time to be a mortgage broker. The whole market has been flipped upside down and people that we could mortgage six months ago we cant even think about now. I cant knock the job really as its good income and basically I spend my whole day talking...
  15. CC51DAS

    Freddy back on loan ?

    Not sure if everyone will have seen fatshrimps bit of news on this on the ex-shrimpers ' Sorry if this has been covered already, but... According to my Dad's Postman, Eastwood was down at Roots Hall yesterday, discussing a loan move back. Where he got this snippet from I don't know, so I...
  16. DTS

    Why did I open my mates parcel......My dilema

    This saturday I for the first time in ages had a day at home and did nothing. My only real aim for the day was to nip into Brighton centre and gets Mrs Dts's Xmas presents. I was meant to go at 10am but as my Hereenven side are doing well on Football Manager I didnt actaully leave till gone...
  17. C C Csiders

    Crosswaord help

    I've nearly completed a prize crossword in on eofthe Sunday 'papers. However, I have just one clue left that I cannot get at all. The clue is: Heavily Laden Postman
  18. Winkle

    Postman/postwomen bycycles!

    Please, someone tell me what the f**Ks are they all about, I mean they look like something out of the fifties. Today I saw a rather rotund postie on his bike and I clearly remember my grandmother riding a bike very similar in 1969. How comes you see these police officers on 50 gear mounting...
  19. TrueBlue

    John Gowens

    Is now a postman for royal mail based in Leigh saw him this morning
  20. David Beckham

    I hear that his available at the end of the season. Maybe able to help us bounce stright back to the championship. I hear he is a good mate of gowers second cousins postman.